because I let fear, stop me, but not this time

"Josh, did Hannah say in her email if we needed to bring any sporting equipment?" Tyler asked as he took the corner too fast and ran into the doorjamb.

"'Graceful, Ty." JC tossed a third sweatshirt into his suitcase. "No, she did not comment on our sporting equipment needs. Why would we need to bring sporting equipment?"

"Well like a baseball glove or a Frisbee or something. Its the middle of the fucking woods, we're going to need something to do."

"I'm sure they will have all of that stuff there. If not, we'll go buy it. No sense in packing it. Besides, we're going to be on a lake with boats, jet skis, tubing. There will be plenty to do."

"Well how would I know? I've never been to the little house in the big woods before."

"Wow, great literary reference. You think you're so clever, don't you?"

Tyler grinned. "I don't think, I know. Why the hell are you packing three sweatshirts? We are only going to be there three nights."

"Hannah said it gets cold at night."

"And you can't wear the same sweatshirt more than one night in a row? You're such a fricken' girl."

JC sighed and ran a hand over his head. "You're right. I have no idea what I'm doing. How do you pack for this shit?"

"You listen to your girlfriend. I brought two pair of shorts, a pair of jeans, swim trunks, some T-shirts, and a sweatshirt, just like Hannah's email told us to." Tyler walked over to JC's suitcase and inspected it further. "Josh, what the hell is wrong with you. Why do you have a dress shirt and that damn vest in here?"

"We'll we're having dinner with her mom on Thursday night."

"Yeah, but I'm pretty sure Hannah said jeans and hoodies were acceptable."

"She wore a dress to mom and dad's when I told her jeans were acceptable."

"You really are a fucking girl. So, what time does our flight leave tomorrow again?"

"We leave LAX at 10:00, get to Minneapolis at 3:00 p.m. Hannah's picking us up and taking us to her mom's house, where we'll have dinner. We'll stay at Hannah's for the night though because she has to wrap some stuff up at the bar."

"Awesome, I want to see that place."

"Then we leave for Brainerd at 8:00 on Friday morning."

"Shit that's early," Tyler whined.

"Its like a three hour drive so you can sleep in the car."

"So how's Hannah been? I haven't talked to her other than a brief email back when she sent the "what to pack" email."

"I haven't talked to her much lately either," JC replied while inspecting his suitcase and removing items he really didn't need. "She's been really busy at work, and I've been in the studio. Just a random text here and there."

Just as JC finished his sentence his phone buzzed, alerting him of a new text message.

"Well I'll leave you alone in case she wants to have text sex."

Tyler left the room and JC took a seat on his bed and grabbed the phone off of the night stand. He really hoped it was Hannah. It had been three days since they last spoke. He was used to daily e-mails or phone calls, so this three-day communication drought really threw him off. He kept telling himself that it wasn't a big deal and he's see her tomorrow anyway. He smiled as he ran his finger over the phone's touch screen, expecting to see an "I miss you," "I love you," or a "See you tomorrow!" He wasn't prepared for what he saw instead.

Saw you at the Chi show. Thx. In LA again. Drink later?

Tony.

Two and a half weeks later and Tony finally acknowleged with more than a head nod that he's seen him in Chicago. JC beamed. It wasn't fixed yet, but it was getting closer. A long talk over drinks was just what they needed.

Of course. Tell me the time and place and Ill see u there.

He sighed and took a seat on the edge of his bed. This is what he wanted to happen more than anything. All he wanted was for Tony to talk to him again and this was a start. He didn't care if Tony sat there the whole time and screamed at him or if he decked him in the face. Anything was better than the total lack of communication they had going now.

Eds. 10:30.

Of course Tony would pick Ed's. Just to torture me, JC thought. That was the bar where this whole drama went down in the first place.

"Was that my future sister-in-law?" Ty shouted from down the hall.

"Would you fucking stop staying that? No, it was Tony, actually."

Ty stopped in the doorway, a look of shock on his face. "Tony, really?"

"He wants to get a drink tonight."

"You gonna go?"

"Of course I'm going to go. Why wouldn't I?"

"I don't know. I just thought maybe you were done. You haven't talked about it in awhile. So I figured..."

"I've been trying to get him to return my calls and e-mails for the last 4 months, Ty."

Tyler looked surprised. "Oh."

"Hannah and I went to his show in Chicago and he saw me. I think that finally made him contact me."

"Well I'm going to be honest with you, Josh. I'm really glad you're making such an effort to get Tony to forgive your sorry ass. He's one of your few true friends. Or other friends are losers."

"Those are mostly your friends too, Ty."

"I know, but let's be honest. They're fun but they aren't real friends, you know?"

"I'm glad I wasn't the only one who has been thinking that. I've been questioning a lot of their shit lately."

"You better finish packing. Could be a late night for you, and it will be a long-ass day tomorrow. Tell Tony I say hey," and Tyler left JC to his packing.

********



Already halfway through his second beer, JC sighed deeply and looked at his phone again. 11:10. Tony was 40 minutes late without so much as a text or a call. Defeated, he downed the last of his beer, pocketed his phone, and headed out the door. He was a half a block down the street when he heard feet pounding the pavement behind him.

"Hey, wait up! Sorry man," Tony panted. "My show ran late, and I forgot my phone."

"Oh yeah, um, no problem." JC was actually rather pissed, seeing as he had to catch a flight the next morning, but he let it roll of his back. He had no right to be the upset one right now. "So um, how ya doin'?"

"Good man. Its um, great to see you. Its been awhile."

JC swallowed hard, hoping the awkwardness of the situation would disappear.

"Yeah. Look, Tony..."

"Let's go grab a beer. No use hashing this out on the street."

Tony turned, and JC followed him back into Ed's. They each downed their first beer in seconds, hoping the bitter liquid would help them say what they really wanted to say. Two beers in, Tony finally spoke up.

"I was pretty convinced I was never going to talk to you again. But you're a persistant little fucker."

"I was a complete fuck. I know that now. I knew that then, the minute I said it. But I was too stubborn or whatever to admit what douche I was being."

"You were a complete and utter shit is what you were."

"I know," JC said quietly, as he motioned for another round of beers. It was a good five minutes before Tony spoke up again.

"I'm not saying I'm over it. But I'm getting there. I'm going to sound like a woman, but I kind of miss having you around. I mean you've been such a huge part of my life. I can't just forget about that."

"What can I do, Tony? I mean, first, I want you to know that I love Miri, I do. She's great and, I never meant to hurt her in anyway with the things I said."

"Well you won't do anything to make it up to her because she doesn't know. I made up some dumb story about why were were fighting. I couldn't tell her the truth."

"Fair enough."

"You'll make it up to me though. I don't know how, but you will."

"I will, I swear." JC paused and took a deep breath. "Look Tony, this is going to sound all zen-like and shit. So actually you'll probably be into it," Tony chuckled as JC continued, "but I've recently kind of forced myself to reflect and evaluate my life after I realized what a fucking loser I'd been acting like. I didn't like where things were headed. I'm working on purging the negative influences in my life."

"You can start with that fuckwad manager of yours. Seriously, half of the problems in your life are because of that incompetant loser and his cronies."

"I'm starting to realize that."

"Why the sudden realization?"

"Well after I messed up our friendship, I did some serious soul searching. Realized I was hanging around with loser, partying too much. And then there was Hannah..."

"The stunner that was at the concert with you?"

"Yeah, took her home to meet the parents."

"Woah woah, who the hell are you?"

"Hell if I know. I've known the girl two months and I've introduced her to my parents and dropped the L word. Its fucking weird, but it is right this time. I know it."

Tony reached over and patted JC's shoulder. "I'm really happy for you, man."

"Thanks Tony. I hate to cut this short, but its already 12:30, and I have to fly to Minnesota in the morning."

"What's in Minnesota?"

"She is."

"When you get back, you're telling me all about this girl."

"I will, man. I'm sorry, again - I'll be saying it until I die. Thanks for calling me though."

"Thanks for harassing me and making me realize I couldn't throw away a more than 15 years of friendship."

Tony pulled JC into a friendly hug, and JC felt relief wash over him. Finally things were right again, and for the first time in years, he felt truly happy.

"Oh, Ty says hi." JC shouted back as he exited the bar.

"Yeah whatever. Tell that little fuck I want my guitar back. He's never going to learn how to play that thing."

JC let out a hearty laugh. "I'll tell him you said so."

Once back at his car, JC pulled out his phone and checked his e-mail. One message - from Hannah, finally.

From: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
To: joshua.scott@gmail.com
Date: May 26, 2007 at 10:47 p.m.
Subject: :D

How did we let three days pass without so much as a word to each other? This is unacceptable! So do you have any idea how excited I am for you to come here tomorrow? I have it all planned - dinner at my moms, then I thought we could walk down to Lake Harriet and catch the concert at the bandshell and pick up some Sebastian Joe's Ice Cream on the way. I can't wait to show you and Ty around my old neighborhood.

And the cabin, oh the cabin will be so much fun. So this is everyone that is coming: Me, you, Ty, my mom, uncle Rob and aunt Gwen, uncle Joe and aunt Sarah, my cousins RJ (Rob Jr.), Alicia, Max, and Mallory, and my uncle Rob might bring my grandma for a day or two - oh, this is all my mom's family by the way. And all of my cousins are in their 20s so Tyler will not feel like a third wheel at all. I probably told you this already, but I'm so excited. Clearly I'm rambling.

You're going to love Minnesota so much you're never going to want to leave!

Love you -

h.

JC beamed. All of the pieces of his life were finally falling into place.

The drive back to the hotel later that night was torture. Hannah hadn't said a word since they said their goodbyes to Roy, Karen, and Tyler. JC couldn't help but notice the way her back was slightly turned away from him as she stared out the window, watching the city lights buzz by.

Roy had apologized for his comment profusely when they left, and Hannah assured him it was not a big deal. But it clearly was a big deal. They needed to sit down and have the discussion they both knew was coming, but had be trying as hard as they could to avoid.

After what seemed like hours, JC finally pulled up to the front of the Park Hyatt. Hannah still hadn't spoken, but she did let him grab her hand as they entered the hotel. On their ascent to the top floors of the hotel, Hannah finally spoke up.

"I'm not moving to LA," she said cooly, but at the same time squeezed JC's hand reassuringly.

"Han, I'm not asking you to."

"I know you're not. I just feel like," she paused and sighed deeply. "Let's just get to our room, get comfortable, and have a long talk, OK?"

They stopped in front of their door and Hannah ran a hand over JC's slightly stubbled cheek. "Before we start discussing this, I just want you to know that regardless of what happened, your parents are incredible. I had such a great time. I love them." She raised up on her toes to give him a slight kiss which he quickly intensified, backing her up against the door.

"What is it with you and pushing me up against this door?" she laughed.

"Mmmm," he moaned into her mouth. "What is it about you? I can't keep my hands off of you."

"Well you have to try. We need to discuss this. But after..." she wiggled her eyebrows, and turned out of his grasp to unlock the door. "I'm going to go take a shower, OK?" I need a few minutes to unwind and gather my thoughts."

JC could feel his face fall as she walked into the bathroom. He had a sinking feeling this converstaion was not going to go well. "OK," he replied. "Take as long as you need. I'll be here when you get out."

*****

Forty minutes later Hannah finally padded out of the bathroom and headed toward JC who sitting on the window seat staring out at the waters of Lake Michigan. He looked up when he heard her approaching and couldn't help but gaze at her coming toward him wearing a short, midnight blue, satin robe - a hint of lace peeking out the bottom.

"You plan on having a serious discussion and you come out here in that?"

"What? Its just pajamas," she said playfully.

"I see lace. What is underneath that?"

She crawled up onto the window seat and sat down next to JC and turned so her legs were bent over his waist and her feet rested on the other side of him. She leaned in and hugged him, resting her head on his shoulder. "Just a little something I bought shopping the other day that we didn't get to last night."

"Well let's get to it now."

"JC," Hannah warned. "After we talk."

He sighed heavily. He knew it had to be done, but he wanted to push it off as long as possible.

"I'm not upset with you, or your dad for what was said tonight. Know that, OK?"

"OK," he said as he ran a comforting hand down her back.

"Its just...it rattled me you know. It got me thinking. In the five years I was with Jake, I never felt as strongly for him as I feel for you. And honestly, that scares the shit out of me. It scares me because after we broke up I told myself I just needed to be alone for awhile. And instead, I've jumped into this relationship headfirst and now I'm drowning. Its like I don't have any control over what's happening."

She looked up at him solemnly, and he continued to rub her back gently. He wasn't quite sure what to say, so hoped she would just continue.

"This is going to sound silly, but in a way, it makes me really angry with myself that I spent five years of my life with a person who didn't make me happy. A person who didn't challenge me, or excite me, or really...get me. What was I doing?"

"Hannah, its normal to feel that way. I always feel like that after a breakup. Why was I wasting time with that person? But you weren't wasting time with Jake. That time with him made you the person you are now. Being with him helped you realize that you wanted and deserved more than what he was giving you."

She hugged him tigher. "I know you're right. Its just hard to believe that, you know?"

"Yeah, I know."

"So, I'm sorry I was so cold on the way home. I just, am confused is all, and needed some time to think."

"Hey, its OK."

"I meant what I said though. I'm not going to move to LA."

"I meant what I said. I'm not asking you to. And I know things are moving fast with us, but I am no where near ready for that."

"So what happens now? We just go on with this see each other every few weeks arrangement?"

JC sighed deeply. "I guess. I'm not sure what else to do."

"We're missing out on all of the normal day-to-day stuff. We're living in this fantasy world of luxurious weekends. What if we hate each other if we have to spend more than 48 hours together?"

JC couldn't help but chuckle. "You're right, I'm sure we'd kill each other within a week." He put his finger under her chin and lifted her mouth to his for a quick kiss. "So seriously though, we'll see each other in three weeks for Memorial Day. Its still OK if Tyler and I come up?"

"Are you kidding. My mom is already hounding me about it. If you don't come, she'll disown me."

"What does your June look like? Mid June?"

Hannah chuckled. "It looks like every other month of the year. I work at the bar. The end."

JC laughed as he tickled the underside of her bare thigh and nuzzled her neck.

"Can you get a vacation?"

"This isn't like a normal job JC. I don't really have vacation time. Without me there..."

"You must have some employee that can step up and help for two weeks."

"Two weeks?" she exclaimed.

"A friend of mine has a house in the Keys and he's going to be away for awhile. I told him I'd go down and house sit. He has a studio there I may putz around in, too. I want you to come with me. Think about it, relaxing on the beach for two weeks, sleeping until noon, drinking and dancing at night, making love all day if we want." His hand crept further up her thigh.

"When is it?"

"June 7 through 22."

"It does sound like the perfect way to spend my 30th birthday."

"So you'll come?"

"I have to ask Kaitlin if she'd be willing to work a lot of extra hours. And my uncle Rob will probably be willing to help out. I have a few kinks to iron out, but yes, I would love to go. We can see how well we get along after spending more than two days together. And I've never been to the Keys before."

"So, we're really OK right? I know things are moving fast and if you want to slow down or step back, just let me know, OK?"

"I don't want to step back. Just know that I get a little scared sometimes."

"I get scared too, Han. I've never felt this way about anyone."

"You seem so calm about it all."

JC let out a guffaw. "Don't let if fool you. I'm scared out of my mind."

"Well I'm glad we're in it together." Hannah climbed off of JC and slid her body between him and the window. She lay on her right side, watching the bustle of the city below. JC spooned himself behind her and ran his palm over her belly and buried his nose in her wavy hair. "You know one thing that excites me about us going back to our respective cities tomorrow? Ever since we got together, we never really talk anymore. I mean we talk, but we don't talk like we do through e-mails. There is still so much we don't know about each other."

"Mmm, maybe so, but think of all the things we are learning about each other."

"Like what?"

"Well I've learned that you aren't shy about sex. That you will get naked and suck me off on my balcony."

"Gross, don't be so crude."

"What? You did it. And you like it when I take you hard up against the door without so much as undressing you."

Hannah moaned softly. "Yes, you're right."

"And you like it when I lick you right here." He moved her hair aside and licked the spot at the back of her neck. She shuttered.

"You win, you know so much about me." Hannah muttered and JC let out a hearty laugh.

"Take off your robe. I want to see what you bought for yourself."

"For myself? I bought it for you. I thought you might be sick of the plain white panties."

"Mmm, but I love those." JC untied her robe and she lifted up to get it off of her right arm. He tossed it aside and took in what he could see of her as she still laid there on her side, her back to him. She was wearing a midnight blue slip that ended right under her butt. At the hem of the slip was a wide strip of black lace, which he had seen peeking out from under the robe earlier. He could tell there was a v-neck in the front and the back that was trimmed with the same lace. It was beautiful. Sexy, but not sleazy. It was perfectly Hannah. He slid a hand up her toned thigh and his fingers crept under the material.

He whispered into her ear, "You're not even wearing panties."

"I told you, you might be sick of them."

"Never, but this is good too." His hand crept up to her stomach and he caressed small circles on her skin and continued kissing her neck. His lips then moved up and started an assault on her earlobe. JC was fully turned on in an instant when Hannah let out the sexiest moan he'd ever heard.

"I can't handle teasing tonight, Jace. I need you inside of me now."

JC didn't object. He wanted to take his time with her and he still would. It just wouldn't involve foreplay. He slid his fingers between her legs to touch her, and was surprised at how wet she already was.

"Damn baby, I've barely touched you." He shifted awkwardly to kick off his pants, and slid the bottom of her nightgown over her hips. "Maybe we shouldn't be doing this practically pressed up against the window."

"No one can see us up here. And there is only one soft light on across the room. No one can see in. Besides, how sexy will it be to lay here staring at the lake."

"Mmm, see I've also learned you're a little bit of an exhibitionist. You would have never told me that in an e-mail."

He slid into her slowly, still spooning her, and she groaned in response. He buried his face back in her neck and began a very slow rhythm. She was quieter than usual. Most of the time she talked during sex, or in no way held back her moans. But tonight she was different. Her loud moans were replaced with soft grunts and quiet sighs, as were JC's. She turned her head back so she could kiss him, and they continued that way, enjoying each other slowly and intimately.

JC realized in that moment that as crazy as it all sounded, he did want her to move to L.A., but now he couldn't ask.


*****

The window seat in question: http://parkchicago.hyatt.com/hyatt/hotels/rooms/room-description.jsp?chooseLocale=&start=9

“I’m so sorry I’m late. I’m entering the hotel right now. What room are we in?”

“No problem, Han. We’re in 2437.

“OK, give me one minute.”

JC waited anxiously at the hotel room door for Hannah to arrive. They were supposed to meet in the lobby at 2:30, and it was 3:45 and she was just arriving. He assumed her conference was running late, but when he saw her through peep hole, she was carrying three shopping bags. He yanked open door before she could knock and yanked her in the room by her upper arm. He shut the door behind him and pushed her hard against the door in a needy kiss, causing her to drop her shopping bags and her suitcase.

“Were you skipping out on me to shop?” He asked between kisses.

“I had to buy a new dress to wear to your parents’ house,” She panted while pulling his pink polo over his head. “The conference ran a little long last night and I didn’t have time to go then.”

“Likely story,” he murmured as he unbuttoned her frilly blouse.

“I didn’t,” she groaned when his tounge ran over her breast, teasing her left nipple through her bra. “And I may have bought a treat for you for later tonight.”

JC pushed her skirt up and skillfully slid her underwear down her thighs, toned from many years of skating. White cotton boyshorts like always. Usually he liked sexy, barely there undergarments, but with Hannah, he found her plain and modest choices dead sexy. He wasn’t planning on attacking her the second she walked in the door, but when he saw her walking down the hallway in her black pencil skirt, proper blouse and black heels, he couldn’t control himself. He loved the classy, businesswoman attire she wore to these conferences.

They continued to kiss as she helped him work his way out of his jeans. Soon he was naked and he pushed her up against the door again, bunching her skirt around her waist as he licked at her neck.

She skimmed her fingers down his back before resting them at the dip of his lower back and leaned in and whispered is in his ear, “Is this how you’re going to take me Jace? Right here against this door?” She licked the outer shell of his ear. He groaned.

“I can take you over to bed if you’d like,” he said while lifting her leg to rest on his hip. His hand slipped between them and he ran a finger over her, causing her to shudder.

“Here’s good,” she groaned as he slid a finger into her. They made eye contact with each other and he slid in another finger.

“I missed you.” He said softly, slowing the pace of his hand.

“I missed you, too.” She leaned in to give him a slow kiss. After a few moments, Hannah increased the pace of the kiss and tried to get JC to speed up the pace of his hand. It wasn’t working.

“Jace,” she groaned as he sucked on her bottom lip. “Fuck me.”

JC wasn’t quite sure how to respond, so he just kept on kissing her and working with his fingers. He had never seen this side of her before. Not that she was ever shy about their lovemaking, but she caught him by surprise.

“Ugh, please, fuck me. Don’t make me beg.”

Who was he to deny her? There he was, just minutes after seeing her for the first time in two weeks, pounding into her with her legs wrapped around his waist and her skirt bunched above her hips. Not the reunion he was expecting, but defintiely good.

She laced her fingers through his hair and tugged his head back so he was looking up at her. “I’ve been thinking about this all day,” she moaned. “I barely made it through my presentation.”

He thrust harder.

“Mmm, you feel so good inside of me.”

He increased his pace.

“Ugh, yeah, right there baby. Right. There.”

JC was overcome with a wave of emotion. How had he been so lucky to find this woman who was smart, sexy, funny, beautiful, open, honest, and giving? He felt incredibly lucky. He felt her walls clench around him and he couldn’t handle it anymore.

“God, Hannah, I love you.” He grunted as he spilled himself inside her.

He froze instantly, horrified by what had just happened. He pulled out of her and carried her over to bed. He leaned forward and buried his head in his hands, and Hannah headed to the bathroom. She came out a few seconds later wrapped in a fluffy bathrobe and carrying one for JC.

“Here, put this on,” she said softly as she sat next to him on the edge of the bed. He obliged.

“Hannah, I am so, so sorrry.”

“For what?” she asked and placed a comforting hand on the back of his neck.

“For what?” he exclaimed.

“Yeah, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“That was not how that was supposed to happen. That was about the least romantic way I could have said that for the first time, fucking you against a hotel room door? Jesus!” He paused to gather his thoughts. “I didn’t even know that I felt that way. I mean, I knew I kind of did, but…I can’t think of anything less romantic than what just happened. God, you didn’t even finish!”

“Hey,” she said softly. “Hey, look at me.” She didn’t continue until he did. “First of all, hearing you say that to me felt better than any orgasm. Secondly, it was romanic in its own way. It was impulsive, unexpected. It wasn’t this big planned out ordeal. It was real. You said it when you felt it. It was completely honest.That’s all I could ask for.”

“So you really aren’t mad?”’ He couldn’t fathom that idea. Previous girlfriends of his would have given him the cold shoulder for weeks had he pulled a stunt like that.

“Not at all. Its always great to hear someone say those words to you, regardless of how it happens.”

“I don’t deserve you.”

She leaned in and gave him a hug. “Say it again,” she whispered.

“I love you.”

“Louder.”

“I love you”

“So only I can hear.”

“I love you,” he whispered into her ear. He couldn’t believe he was saying this multiple times and not running away. It had been a month and a half and he was already using the L word? This was getting out of hand. Yet somehow, he wasn’t scared.

“I love hearing you say that to me,” Hannah pulled him into a sweet kiss. “I’m sorry I was late today. I just really wanted to find something nice to wear to meet your parents tomorrow.”

“You know, we’re probably only going to have steaks on the patio. You can wear jeans. Its nothing fancy.”

“I just want them to like me.”

“They will love you. Regardless of what you wear.”

“Well I’m wearing the dress. Its too pretty not to wear,” she giggled for a moment before her face fell. “Oh, um, I need to, um, go clean up.”

His eyes widened in realization. “Oh shit, Hannah! I didn’t use a condom!”

“We, JC. We didn’t use a condom. Its both of our faults. I’m on the pill, so we don’t need to
worry about that. But um, you’ve been tested recently, right?”

“Two months ago. I was clean. Only a week or so before I met you actually. I’m always safe, I swear.”

“I trust you JC. I’m clean too. But um, we probably should have had this conversation before this happened. We both were being irresponsible.”

“Yes, we were.” He paused, and tried to lighten the mood. “So, can I help you clean up?” he
asked with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

------------------

The pair dined over a romantic seafood dinner at NoMi, the hotel’s restaurant overlooking the Magnificent Mile. Afterward, JC suggested they go to a concert at a small club north of downtown.

“My friend Tony is playing at this club tonight. I, um…I haven’t seen him in awhile.”

“I’m sure he will be really excited to see you,” Hannah said as she laced her fingers with JC’s on their walk down Michigan Avenue.

“We haven’t talked in over six months. I don’t think he’ll be excited to see me. I was a real asshole to him. I want to apologize but I haven’t tried too hard.”

“Its probably best to do it in person anyway. That’s hard when he’s in Chicago.”

“He lives in LA. He just happens to be playing here this weekend.”

“Oh. Can I ask what you did?”

“Things had been strained for awhile. He was getting married and we didn’t see each other much because of it. We were supposed to work on a project together and he bailed on me. Which wasn’t a huge deal, but it was kind of building up you know. Then we were out together one night...I got really wasted and was hitting on this girl – being kind of obnoxious – and Tony was trying to be helpful and intervene because I was being a jackass. I made some dumb ass comment remark about him being jealous that he couldn’t get a girl that hot…completely insulting his fiance…and then I just went off – about how he was jealous of my fame, which he isn’t – just crap like that. It was so awful. He hasn’t talked to me since.”

Hannah stopped walking and faced JC, taking both of his hands in hers. “Do you want to know that truth JC?” He nodded. “That was really shitty. Really shitty. I wouldn’t talk to you either.”

“I know. And I didn’t mean it. Not any of it. I don’t know how to fix it.”

“Well you must have meant some of it, or you wouldn’t have said it. I think there were some issues there that needed to be addressed, and you picked the dumbest way to do it.”

“You don’t take pity on a guy do you?”

“No, not when they are idiots.”

“Yeah well, it was kind of that moment that made me realize I was acting like a real asshole lately. I started re-evaluating friendships and what was important to me. I’ve been kind of lost ever since.”

She gave him a reassuring sqeeze of his hands. “Do you think it is a good idea to go tonight?”

“I do. Even if I don’t talk to him. I just feel I should be there. I just want to see him perform. He’s incredible.”

“OK then, lets do it.”

JC and Hannah snuggled in a booth during Tony’s show and went relatively unnoticed. Some people were only fans of Tony because of JC and he knew that, so he dressed down and slipped his Minnesota Twins cap over his head. Nobody would expect to see him wearing that. He received a few questioning glances, but that was all.

Tony did notice him however, and for the most part tried to avoid eye contact, but three-quarters of the way through the show, when Hannah went to the bathroom, Tony shot JC a questioning look, and cocked his head to the side. JC knew he was trying to ask who the girl was. He just smiled at Tony in return.

They left right after the show. JC thought there might be a possibility Tony would talk to him after the show, but he wanted to take it one step at a time. The eye contact was good enough for tonight.

JC had the cab drop them off a few blocks away from the hotel so they could enjoy the walk the remainder of the way. The walked in silence for a bit before JC spoke up.

“Tell me something I don’t know about you.”

“Um. OK. Let’s see. I guess I need to tell you this eventually anyway, and I don’t want it to come up at your parents and catch you off-guard.”

“I don’t like the way you’re starting this.”

“Its nothing bad. Its just – I was engaged.”

“You were? To who?”

“His name was Jake. We were together about five years. We broke up right after my dad died. Our wedding was supposed to be three weeks after he died. I couldn’t go through with it. I was so upset and Jake was trying to comfort me. I just wanted him to go away. I realized something wasn’t right with that. Anyway, I called it off a week before the wedding.”

“Wow. That was only a year ago wasn’t it?”

“A little over a year, yeah.”

“And you’ve moved on already?”

“Once you realize someone isn’t right for you, I don’t see any need to dwell in it.”

“I wish I knew how to do that. My last serious relationship fucked me up good. You’re the first person I’ve been serious with since her, and that was two years ago.”

“Eva?”

JC groaned.

“I’m sorry, I know you asked me not to google you.”

“No, I know. I would probably google me too if I were you. But yeah, Eva.”

“What happened?”

“She was cheating on me for about half of our relationship. We dated a year.”

“I’m really sorry. If that were the case with me, I would be messed up for awhile too. With Jake I just realized he wasn’t the one. There weren’t necessarily hard feelings. We just grew apart.”

“I became a real asshole after that. I just went clubbing most nights, drank too much and got high too often. I wasn’t surrounding myself with good people. I’m working on that. I’m slowly rebuilding myself into the person I know I am.”

Hannah slipped the key into the lock and they entered the hotel room. She turned to JC and took his face in her hands. “I love the person you are.”

JC beamed and leaned into kiss her. “Why didn’t you say so earlier.”

“I didn’t want you to settle for a ‘me too.’ I love you JC.” He pulled her into a tight embrace. “Thank you for tonight. I had an amazing time.”

“I did too. You’re a good date, Han. Thanks for meeting me in Chicago.”

“Anytime.” She paused. “Hey JC?”

“Yeah?”

“I think we should break in that amazing bathtub we have in there.”

“Mmm, I think you’re right.”

“I need to relax before tomorrow.”

“Stop worrying about meeting my parents.”

“I can’t help it.”

“Well come on. Get in the tub and let me give you a massage to relieve some tension.” JC offered as he pulled her into the bathroom.

------

Links:

Hannah in her 'business outfit' that turns JC on so much: http://images.eonline.com/eol_images/Entire_Site/20070830/293.garner.jennifer.083007.jpg

Park Hyatt hotel room: http://parkchicago.hyatt.com/hyatt/hotels/gallery/index.jsp?roomId=969&tabType=photo&start=1

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t my big brother Joshua! And here I thought you were kidnapped by a rabid fan or something.”

“Shut up, Ty,” JC muttered as he went to the fridge for a Coke.

“What was I supposed to think? I haven’t seen you in like five days. Your girlfriend leaves and you’ve been holed up in your room ever since…”

“I wasn’t in my room,” JC interrupted sternly. “I’ve been in the studio. A lot.”

“Finally find a new muse?”

“You could say that.”

JC took a seat at the island, and glanced at the mess Tyler made on the table. He was surrounded in thick books and stacks of papers, which he frequently referenced while typing quickly. JC was always amazed by his brother and sister’s dedication to formal education. He just never had the patience to sit still and study like they did.

“Josh I haven’t really gotten a chance to talk to you since Hannah left. How are you doing?

“Fine. It sucks but…I mean I’m handling it. Really we didn’t even get together,” he emphasized with air quotes, “until this past weekend anyway. We’ve been dating, what? Six days? Four of which we haven’t even seen each other?”

“Yeah but,” Tyler paused. “Technically six days or not, it feels like you’ve been together a lot longer.”

JC responded with a half-hearted shrug.

Tyler continued. “I’m just really glad to see you so happy, even though you’re kind of mopey right now. I didn’t think you’d be able to fall so hard again after…”

“Don’t even mention her name.” JC interjected forcefully.

Tyler nodded. “OK, I won’t.”

They sat in silence a few moments before Tyler spoke up again.

“I think that when I’m the best man in your wedding I’m going to tell the story that you paid me to go to Vegas for the weekend so you could be alone with Hannah.”

“I didn’t pay you to go to Vegas, I paid for you to go. There’s a diff….Wait, what to you mean at my wedding?” JC asked incredulously.

Tyler shrugged nonchalantly. “I just think that this one has the chance to go all the way. I think she is just what you need. I only spent a few hours with the two of you, but the way you complimented each other…I’ve just never seen you like that with someone before.”

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here, Ty.” As much as he wanted to shout out ‘we’re not getting married,’ he couldn’t. Ty did have a point. He had never felt so at ease around any of his girlfriends before. Tyler, and the rest of his family for that matter, always hated his girlfriends, so if Ty really liked her and thought this could last, maybe he was on to something.

“But um,” JC continued, “speaking of getting ahead of ourselves, what are you doing the weekend of the 10th?”

“Nothing! Finals are that week, so its my first weekend of freedom.”

“Want to go visit mom and dad? Its Mother’s Day weekend. And um, Hannah will be in Chicago. I’d like to see her.”

“Wait until mom finds out this has nothing to do with Mother’s Day and everything to do with you getting laid.”

“Tyler, when did you become such a fucking smart ass? I think I’m going to introduce Hannah to mom and dad.”

Tyler’s eyes widened in surprise. “Wow, already? I mean, I’m not really surprised, but…wow, I guess I’m really surprised.” He laughed. “I don’t think she who must not be named even met mom.”

“She didn’t. I guess deep down I just knew it wouldn’t work out.”

“Well mom and dad are going to go crazy for Hannah. So will Heather is she ever meets her.”

“So you’ll go then? I’ll get our tickets.”

“Yeah, I’ll go.”

“OK good, I’ll call mom and let her know. I have to tell her about Hannah anyway.”

“She won’t believe you.”

“Shut up you ass and finish your paper,” JC muttered under his breath as he walked away.

-------------------

From: joshua.scott@gmail.com
To: hjannsen@janssenspub.net
Date: May 2, 2007 at 5:57 p.m.
Subject: “What have you done with my son?!”

That’s what my mom said to me when I told her that I was bringing a girl home next weekend. My daily secret is this – I haven’t brought a girl home since the heyday of nsync. Her name was Bobbie (I’m sure you’ll hear more about her some other time…..) My parents hated her, so I just kind of quit bringing girlfriends home. So my mom was ecstatic when I told her about you. She said, “Joshua, a nice Midwestern girl is just what you need.” – ha ha – now you better impress! Kidding, you don’t have to do anything special. Just show up and she’ll adore you.

I adore you. I miss you.

-j

From: hjanssen@janssenpub.net
To: joshua.scott@gmail.com
Date: May 2, 2007 at 10:32 p.m.
Subject: Re: “What have you done with my son?!”

I miss you, too. This is stupid. I’m being such a freakin’ girl.

I was excited to meet your mom but now I’m just nervous! My mom wants to know when she can meet you, and she keeps whining that she can’t wait until Memorial Day. She was kind of bitchy when I told her I would miss Mother’s Day, but she can deal. Jens will call and she’ll forget all about me anyway 

Don’t you think I’ve forgotten that we’ve haven’t had “The Ex” conversations yet. Not that it really matters, but its good to get that stuff out of the way. I’ve been doing some online research, and I must say…I’m not an actress or a model, so I hope you don’t kick me to the curb. In my online research I also found this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vNUESlnxns

I also enjoyed parts 2 – 4.

“Quit yankin’ my chain!”

HA HA HA HA.

-h.



From: joshua.scott@gmail.com
To: hjannsen@janssenspub.net
Date: May 4, 2007 at 12:50 a.m.
Subject: Re: re: re: “What have you done with my son?!”

Stop googling me. Its not fair. And I’m not even going to dignify that link with a response.

I really wish you were in my bed tonight.

j.

-------------

JC groaned as his phone buzzed on his nightstand. He had just managed to fall asleep about a half hour ago, and now his phone was ringing at 1:30 a.m. “Who the fuck is calling me now?”

Hannah.

“Hi,” he mumbled in a gravely voice.

“Hi to you, too.” He could hear the flirtation in her voice. “I got your e-mail. You can’t send stuff like that and then go to bed.”

“Stuff like what?” He had no idea what was going on.

“Um, stuff like “I really wish you were in my bed tonight.”

“Its 3:30 where you are. Why are you awake?”

“I was working. Just got done cleaning up the bar for the night and I come home to that message. If it makes you feel any better, I wish I were in your bed tonight too.”

“Mmm,” JC groaned. “Is it Friday yet? I can’t wait to kiss you senseless.”

Hannah groaned in return. “Only four more days. So, we’re not staying at your parents’ right? I mean, I want to have wild, passionate, monkey sex and if we were at your parents’ house your mom would no longer think I’m a nice Midwestern girl,” Hannah laughed.

“We’re staying at the Park Hyatt. I’ll meet you there on Friday afternoon and we won’t head over to casa Chasez until Saturday afternoon – if that’s OK. My parents want to cook for us on Saturday.”

“I love the Park Hyatt! And its right by the Ghirardelli store. Even better! We’ll have to have sundaes,” she paused. “You know what the best thing about Chicago is?”

“What?”

“That we’ve both been there countless times. No need to sight see. We can stay in our hotel room the entire time.”

JC let out a quiet grunt and they laid in silence for awhile, comforted by the sound of each other’s breathing.

“I really miss you,” Hannah finally spoke quietly. “I fell really hard, really fast.”

“I think we both did,” JC replied softly.

“This distance thing….”

“Sucks?”

“Yeah. How are we going to do this?”

“I wish I could answer that.”

“Its just…kind of strange before because I’ve never been this happy or this miserable in my life. It’s a bizarre contradiction.”

“I know,” JC whispered. There was an uncomfortable silence as JC tried to figure out what to say, but he had no idea. The distance thing was already a problem and it was only going to continue to grow.

“Jace, I’m falling asleep over here. I should go. Its almost 4 a.m.”

“Yeah, get some rest,” he paused, not quite knowing what to say. “I will see you on Friday, OK? 2:30, Park Hyatt lobby.”

“I’ll be there. Tell Tyler I can’t wait to see him.”

“I will.”

They were both quiet for a few moments before JC spoke up.

“One of us needs to say goodbye.”

“No, let’s just both hang up on the count of three. OK, one, two, three…”

And JC hung up.

“I think I’m falling in love with you too, Hannah,” he whispered to himself before dozing off.

JC groaned as he rolled over and reached for Hannah, only to feel the mattress where she should be laying.

"Han, where are you?" He asked, silently praying for a response.

"I'm out on the patio. Come join me."

Relief washed over him as he slowly rolled out of bed. "6:22?" he muttered and slid on his boxer briefs. "Fuck its early."

His breath caught in his throat as he saw her reclining in the chaise lounger. The sun was rising over the hills and was reflecting off of her pale skin, making it appear golden in color. Her hair was loose over her shoulders and kinky in spots from sleeping. She wore a short, violet, satin robe that was loosely tied and falling open at her upper thighs. He had honestly never seen someone look so beautiful.

"Good morning." She beamed at him, and scooted to the side of the chair. She gently patted the small vacant spot next to her.

JC worked his way into the narrow space and they lay on their sides facing each other, legs instinctively intertwining.

"I'm so sorry I fell asleep right after JC. I was so tired." She ran a comforting hand over his cheek. "It had nothing to do with..." she paused. "It was amazing."

"Amazing is an understatement. Don't worry about it, I know you tired were, Han. It's OK."

She leaned over and brought her lips to his but did not kiss him. "I think you should walk around in those boxer briefs all day," she said as her lips rubbed against his.

He moaned at his body's response, even though she hadn't even kissed him. "Only if you promise to wear that robe."

She rolled over slightly so she was now on top of him, and began kissing and licking down his neck. "Mmm, I don't know," she moaned against his Adam’s apple, causing a vibration against his neck. "I think I'd prefer not to wear it."

JC grabbed her upper arms and pulled her up to him, kissing her forcefully. Whatever was happening between them felt incredible. Last night had been needy and emotional. This morning was sexy and playful. She didn't seem to be holding anything back with him and he loved it.

She pulled her lips away from his and brought her lips to his ear. "I didn't get to taste you last night, Jace. You have no idea how much I want to," she said with a playful bite of his earlobe. He just groaned in response. "Do you want me to?" she whispered. She reached her hand behind her to rub him over his underwear. "It feels like you do," she panted into his ear.

He bucked his hips to regain friction with her hand to no avail. "Shit Hannah."

"Hmm, I'll take that as a yes," She said as she slid her lips back down his neck, this time descending further and latching onto one of his nipples. She slid her left hand up his chest and over his chin, two of her fingers landing in his mouth as he sucked and licked them gently.

She stopped her assault on his nipple and sat up on his stomach, her fingers still in his mouth. The tie on her robe loosened and had fallen open, exposing her breasts to him. She rutted against him softly. "We should have been doing this all night. I can't believe I fell asleep," she muttered while pulling her fingers out of his mouth and running a trail of his saliva down his chest. "Nobody makes me feel the way you do JC," she muttered as she slid further down his body, licking his stomach at the top of his underwear band. He instinctively raised his hips to her, but she pushed his hip back down and giggled.

"Hold on, I'm getting there."

She sat back on her knees and tugged at the waistband of his underwear. "Lift," she demanded and he did, suddenly exposed to her completely. "Wait, nobody can see us out here can they?"

"Only from the other balcony," JC grunted. "But its really early, Ty isn't awake."

"Well in that case..." Hannah tossed her robe aside, forming a pile with JC's boxer briefs. She took him into her hand and stroked softly.

He panted quietly. "Hannah, Han..." He breathed deeply.

"What are you trying to say JC? Maybe that you want me to do this?" She asked before languidly licking up his shaft. "Or maybe this?" She ran her fingertips over his scrotum while she continued her assault with her tongue.

"Shit Hannah."

As this was happening, JC couldn't help to take a moment and think about how lucky he was to have found this woman. She was funny, smart, beautiful, amazing in bed...No wonder all of the woman he had dated in the past hadn't lasted. He didn't know it then, but none of them could hold a candle to her. She was perfect. For him, anyway.

He looked down at her continuing to pleasure him with her mouth and he groaned at the sight. He couldn't remember the last time he was this turned on. His hands gently played with her hair until he was about to reach his breaking point. He tried to pull her up off of him before he came, but she wouldn't let him. She took his hands from her head and laced his fingers between hers as he finished.

He fell back with a thump and she crawled up and snuggled against him, a bit chilled by the morning breeze.

"Hannah, you didn't have to..."

She placed a finger over his lips. "Shh. I know. I wanted to. You ought to know by now that I don't do things I don't want to, JC."

"You're an incredible woman Hannah." He kissed her softly and could taste himself on her lips. He had never done that before, but it didn't gross him out like he thought it might. In fact, he found it kind of hot.

They lay on the chaise for over an hour, snuggling under the blanket JC had grabbed from his room and just enjoying each other - both of them acutely aware this was the last morning they would be able to spend like this for quite some time.

------------

"You're sure this is what you want to do on your last day here?" JC asked as he backed out of his garage in his convertible.

"Yes! I never get to ride around in convertibles in Minnesota. Nobody I know has one because they don't make much sense. I just want to drive around and enjoy the scenery and feel the wind in my hair."

"Well if its what the lady wants..." JC said as he zipped out of the driveway.

Hannah laughed uncontrollably at his silly antics as he sped out of the driveway and called her "the lady." JC couldn't help but grin at her beaming smile as he drove her through the hills.

They spent the next three hours driving along the coast and feeling like they didn't have a care in the world. Record companies, friends, family problems - in this moment it didn't matter.

When they finally returned to JC's house, he led her downstairs into his studio. They plopped down onto the sofa, exhausted.

"So," he began, "I recall you saying you had written a new song and you were going to play it for me. Now is as good as time as any, I would say."

Hannah nudged him slightly in the ribs. "Well if you're going to force me, I guess..." and she sat at the piano. "OK, just keep in mind, this isn't a very deep song or anything. Its kind of silly, but I was in a silly mood when I wrote it. Seriously its not..."

"Quit stalling. Just play it."

"Fine," she huffed.

It's not everyday/That I find a person quite like you/Perfect every way
I finally found the nerve to confess that it's you that I want/I don't care if I act a fool/I would damn near beg for you/Put aside, all my pride/So don't keep me hanging here
Cause this girl is falling stupid for you...
Oh, oh stupid for you...

The proper thing to do/Is for me to act like a lady and wait/For you to make the first move/
But I don't think you're getting the point/That it's you that I want/I don't care if I act a fool/I would damn near beg for you/Put aside, all my pride/So don't keep me hanging here
Cause this girl is falling stupid for you
Oh, oh stupid for you

Why's it always feel like I am/Chasing love when nothing's there/And here I go just making the same mistakes...

I've fallen stupid for you
Oh, oh stupid for you

(Stupid For You - Marie Digby)

"Aww Hannah that was so cute," JC said as he took a seat next to her at the piano. "Very...bouncy."

"Quit making fun. I told you it was a silly song."

"I love it. And I'm glad you didn't act like a lady and wait for me to make a move because I wasn't going to. Even if it killed me."

"Yeah well, things worked out all right anyway, didn't they."

"They sure did," he mumbled as he kissed her. "Stay here, I have something for you."

JC ran out of the studio and upstairs to his bedroom. He hoped that his gift to her wasn't too much too soon, but he felt that he owed her something for all that she did for him that day in Minneapolis. When he found out she was coming to visit, he searched online for hours before he stumbled upon it. When he returned to the studio, Hannah was playing some tune he wasn't familiar with, but stopped immediately when she saw him bound in.

"If you don't like it, promise you'll tell me."

"Of course I will like it," she said as he sat next to her on the bench.

"But if you don't?"

"I promise," she said as she leaned him and kissed him softly.

"Its just something that reminds me of the day we met."

Hannah gasped as he handed her the light blue box she had only seen in movies, tied with a silver ribbon. Before she even opened it she stuttered, "Jace, I can't take this. Its too much, I..."

"Just open it." He urged.

Hannah looked up at him and he noted that her eyes were already wet, and she hadn't even opened the box. He watched her eyes widen when she opened the box and she immediately let out a sob.

"JC, its...I can't...I..." she set down the gift on top of the piano and slid into his arms, crying.

"Hey, hey now," he comforted. "It wasn't supposed to make you sad."

"I don't want to leave," she mumbled, trying to fight her tears. He put a finger under her chin and lifted her head to look at him. He wiped tears from her face with his thumb. "I don't want you to leave either, Han. This is going to be too hard. Maybe we shouldn't have..."

"No!" she interrupted forcefully. "We should have. We can deal with this. We have to. I'm just having a moment of weakness, that's all. Now put this beautiful necklace on me."

JC gently took the necklace out of the box as Hannah lifted her long hair so he could clasp the necklace. The tiny silver snowflake fell against her chest, and JC leaned forward to kiss the spot where is rested. Hannah laced her fingers through his hair and pulled his head up to meet her lips. They met in a passionate and needy kiss.

"When am I going to see you again?" Hannah asked between kisses. "Do I have to wait until Memorial Day? That's like five weeks away."

"When are you speaking in Chicago?" JC asked as his fingers slid up the back of her tank.

"May 9. A few days before Mother's Day."

"Can you stay through the weekend?"

"My mom will be upset but I can work it out." Hannah groaned as he slid her shirt over her head.

"My parents live in Chicago. I want you to meet them. Ty was right, my mom is going to love you."

"An odd thing to say while I'm undoing your zipper."

JC laughed. "But she will. So will my dad."

Hannah finished the last of the buttons on his shirt and slid it down his shoulders. "So we're that far along already, huh? Meeting the parents?"

"Too much too soon?" he asked, while unclasping her bra.

"No. I mean, I already know your brother. And you met the guy I lost my virginity to."

JC groaned. "Hannah, did you have to tell me that now?"

She giggled. "Don't worry, it wasn't any good. And it certainly didn't happen on a piano bench."

"Still."

"JC, I haven't been this happy in a really long time."

He stopped his frantic movements and looked into her eyes, which were still wet from left over tears.

"Remember when I asked what your defining moment was?" she continued. "I think mine is right now. This time in my life. The things I thought it was before - the end of my hockey career, my dad dying...they were all leading up to this moment. This time in my life when I finally feel like I can do anything that I want and nothing is holding me back. You helped me realize that."

He didn't know how to respond, so he leaned in and kissed her slowly, and ran his hands down her back.

-------

It had only been five hours since Hannah left, and JC already didn't know what to do with himself. After a teary goodbye and promises of seeing each other in two weeks, Hannah finally went through security and left him with a half-hearted wave. As he sat there now in his studio, unconsciously hitting random piano keys, he couldn't get the image of them making love on the very same bench out of his mind. A woman had never had this much pull over him. He took a deep breath, and began playing a song when his phone buzzed with a text message.

I'm home safe. I have a secret. I might be falling in love with you

----------

"Stupid for You" by Marie Digby




Hannah's necklace (just pretend there is a chain - lol)
http://www.tiffany.com/Shopping/item.aspx?sku=22640038&cid=287463&search_params=s+5-p+30-c+287463-r+-x+-n+6-ri+-ni+0-t&mcat=148204

"There you are. I was looking for you."

JC walked into his studio to find Hannah lying on the sofa with a notepad in hand. It was only 6:30 a.m., but she looked ready to go for the day. She wore pale blue shorts with a navy tank, and her wavy hair cascaded over her shoulders. "I guess you didn't have a problem finding the studio."

She rolled on to her side and smiled when she saw him. His hair was disheveled, his cheeks had a smattering of stubble, his white T-shirt was rumpled and he wore the Minnesota Hockey sweatpants she had given him.

"Sorry, I've been up for...well, since I left your room. I took it upon myself to explore. I hope you don't mind."

He lifted her feet and took a seat at the end of the sofa, and set her legs down on his lap. He played with her toes as he spoke. "Of course I don't mind."

She giggled when his fingers brushed over a ticklish spot on her foot. "How on earth did you manage to fall asleep again last night? Seriously, you were only up for like a half hour last night. You practically had 12 hours of sleep."

"I needed it I guess. It was a stressful week. I'm surprised you didn't sleep more. You said you were already up for an hour when I got up. If you've been up since then, you only got like five hours of sleep."

Hannah set her notepad and pen on the floor, and sat up. She removed her feet from JC's grip, and adjusted herself so she was straddling his lap. He groaned as she held his face in her hands.

"I can't believe I said what I said last night. It is not at all like me to be so forward." She murmured, "But I'm so glad I did."

JC gently ran his hands over her back. "I'm glad you did, too. So what were you doing down here?"

"Just playing around on the piano. Finished writing that song I started the other day."

"Are you going to play it for me?"

"I think I could do that," She said before wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning her head against his shoulder. "Mmm, I'm so happy here."

JC tightened his arms around her. It felt so good to sit here with her and just be. "I'm so happy that you are here."

"I can't remember the last time I had a vacation. I work all the time. And even when I'm not working, I'm just upstairs so people usually come bother me. But to be here and not worry about the bar, or my problems with Jens, or keeping my mom company. Its heaven."

"I'm glad I could help you escape for a little while."

She snuggled into him and squeezed tighter. "Me too."

"What do you want to do today? Shopping on Rodeo? Lunch at the Ivy? Celebrity house tours? Whatever else it is tourists do when they come here?"

She sat up and looked him directly in the eyes. "Mmm, first, I want to do this." She leaned her forehead against his and nuzzled their noses together, as they both grinned. "And then this." Her lips met his in a lazy kiss. It wasn't hesitant and it wasn't passionate, just slow and languid and perfect.

"As for your suggestions, I really don't want to do any of those things, and I'm 100 percent positive you don't either. Um, this might sound silly but would you maybe want to go to an Angels game tonight?" She looked slightly embarrassed. "I mean, I don't know if you like baseball, but its just the Twins are in town and a friend of mine gave me tickets to the game and I thought maybe..."

"Of course we can go to the game tonight. I've never known a girl who was so into sports. I like it. I'm kind of indifferent towards baseball, but I would love to go. A friend of yours gave you tickets for a game out in LA? That's kind of random."

"He's um, on the team. When he heard I was going to be out here he hooked me up."

"He's a Twin?"

"Yeah, we used to date like, forever ago."

"Oh really?" he said playfully.

"Yes really, like, right after high school. He grew up in Minneapolis and was friends with my brother. We still hang out sometimes."

"Are you saying I'm competing with professional athletes here?"

"Please. It's not like he's Santana or something. He's a relief pitcher. Besides he's married. You have nothing to worry about."

"Who is Santana?"

"Oh my God. I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that." She leaned into nuzzle him again. "Anyway, what time does Eric's party start? I don't want you to miss it."

"Don't worry. Probably won't even really get going until like 12:30 or 1:00. I don't even know if I want to go."

"Why not? You don't want me to meet your friends?"

"I do, but I kind of just want to bring you back here. I said I didn't put out before the first date, I didn't say anything about after."

"Oh I see." She giggled as he gently nipped at her neck. "You think so, huh?"

He looked at her seriously. "I hope so."

"Well I think it is a definite possibility," she whispered as she began to lick and nibble his earlobe. She gently rolled her hips against his as she worked her way down his neck. His fingers hesitantly slid under the hem of her shirt and caressed her back as her lips finally reached his. For the first time their kiss was needy and urgent. And they couldn't get enough.

They didn't hear the footsteps down the stairs, or the turning of the doorknob.

"Hey Josh I'm..."

JC and Hannah pulled apart with a start, and turned toward the door both flushed and panting.

"...home."

JC was shooting daggers with his eyes and spoke through gritted teeth. "What are you doing here Ty? You are supposed to be in Vegas."

"I, um, Jen's dad had a heart attack, so Evan wanted to come back to be with her. I'm um, really sorry to interrupt."

“Oh my goodness, you’re Tyler?” Hannah exclaimed as she jumped off of JC’s lap and ran over to him. She held out her hand in greeting. “I’m Hannah. It is so awesome to meet you! I was bummed when JC told me you would be out of town this weekend.”

Tyler shook her hand politely and shot JC a questioning look. “Its nice to meet you too, Hannah.”

JC was mortified. He hadn’t told anyone in his life about Hannah, even though she had heard stories about all of them. And if Tyler said anything about the fact that he paid for Tyler and Evan to go to Vegas for the weekend because JC had to focus on work, any progress he had made with Hannah would come to a halt. He had to stop this immediately.

He walked up to Hannah and gently rubbed her back. “Han, would you mind giving me and Tyler a minute alone?”

“Of course not. I was thinking of taking a swim anyway. I’ll meet you up there.” She gave JC a brief kiss before grabbing her notepad and heading upstairs.

Tyler broke out into a fit of giggles immediately after she left. “Hard work in the studio huh? Since when do you kick us out just so you can get laid? And I must say, bro, she is quite lovely.”

“Shut up Ty. Hannah’s not…Hannah’s not just some girl. I’ve known her for about a month. Remember when I went to Minnesota?”

“Yeah.”

“I met her there.”

“That would explain the pants. I’ve never known you to be a college hockey fan. You met her in Minnesota and you asked her back for more? That’s not like you. She must be some lay.”

“Knock it off asshole. Its not like that. We haven’t even…She’s really special, Ty.”

"Oh. OHHH!" Tyler, exclaimed knowingly. "You really have it bad for this girl, don't you?"

JC grinned shyly. "Kind of, yeah. I honestly have never met anyone like her. She's incredible."

"Well I can't lie. I'm a little hurt you didn't tell me about her, but I'm glad that you are so happy."

"I just didn't want to jinx it. We were just friends. Nothing happened in Minnesota. And then we were e-mailing back and forth for the past few weeks and it just turned out that she was coming to LA for a conference. Nothing remotely romantic happened until last night."

"Yeah, but you were planning on it happening or you wouldn't have sent Evan and I to Vegas for the weekend."

"I honestly wasn't planning on it, but I was hoping for it. Hey, do you want to have lunch with us today? I know Hannah would love it if you did. I would kind of like you to get to know her, myself."

"Meeting the family already huh?" Tyler beamed. "Of course I'll go to lunch with you guys. I need to meet the girl who got into my big bro's cold, cold heart."

"Just act like I already told you about her OK? She would be hurt if I she knew I was keeping her a secret." Ty nodded in response. "So how's Jen's dad?"

"He's going to be fine, but she really needed Evan to be there for her."

"Totally understandable. I hope she's hanging in there."

"She'll be fine now that Evan's here. Look, I'm going to go study. And you have a beautiful girl waiting for you in the pool. What are you doing down here with me?"

JC smiled at his brother with deep appreciation. "Thanks Ty. Lets plan on leaving around 1:00, OK?"

"Sounds good. Later man."

-------

JC and Hannah spent a few hours lounging around the pool before they headed up stairs to get ready for lunch.

"Hey Jace, when you're done getting dressed, come to my room for a minute," she shouted down the hallway.

A few minutes later he appeared in her doorway wearing a pair of loose fitting jeans, a navy Lacoste polo, and what looked to be a pair of brand new Adidas with navy stripes.

"Mmm, I approve. This is going to look so good. Close your eyes."

He looked at her skeptically before sealing his lids shut. He heard some rustling around before she finally said "Open 'em."

She held out a red baseball cap with a blue bill, featuring the Twins logo. "I thought you might need this for the game tonight."

He grinned as he slid it over his damp hair. "I love it."

"You look hot."

"Well then, I guess it stays for the day. Ready to go?"

She grabbed her sunglassed and purse off of the dresser. "Yes, I'm starving!"

JC, Hannah and Tyler arrived at a little sidewalk cafe about a half an hour later. The ride over was tortuous for JC, as Hannah would not shut up for a moment. She was fawning over Tyler, They were getting along so well that they had started teasing him, and it was annoying. But he was glad they were getting along.

After what seemed like hours, the waitress finally came to take their order. "I'll have the caesar salad with grilled shrimp. And um, a Corona."

Hannah looked at him with disgust as the waitress walked away. "Ew."

"You'll have to ignore my brother. He has the strangest eating habits."

"What is strange about what I ordred?"

"A salad and beer?" Hannah would not lose that tone of digust in her voice.

"Whatever it is good."

Despite the teasing, lunch was a success. JC could tell that Tyler adored Hannah almost as much as he did. The whole moment was relaxed and perfect. In fact the whole weekend was turning out to be. What would he do when she left?

"Did you family ever go camping?" Hannah inquired as she poked at the remains of her chicken salad wrap.

"We never really went camping as kids. We were always going to Disney to visit Josh."

"I wish we went to Disney as kids. All we ever did was go camping. No real family vacations. But still, camping is awesome. In fact, my family rents a cabin in northern Minnesota every Memorial Day weekend. You guys should come."

"Hell yeah!"

"Ty," JC warned.

"I'm serious. I know its only a few weeks away and you may have plans, but if you don't the invitation stands. It is great. My mom and I, my aunts and uncles and cousins all share one big cabin. Basically all we do is swim, go boating and drink. And sing around the campfire at night. Ty, you can bring a friend if you want."

JC couldn't help but smile as her face lit up while telling them about the cabin. He actually didn't have anything going on that weekend and couldn't help but think it might be the next opportunity to see her.

"That sounds great, Hannah." JC answered quietly while gently rubbing her knee under the table.

"Josh, when are you going to introduce her to mom. Mom is going to flip. Seriously, Hannah. Mom never likes Josh's girlfriends, but she is going to adore you." She blushed furiously as Tyler spoke.

"Ty, knock it off."

"Sorry," he grumbled.

Hannah reached across the table and grabbed Tyler's hand. "Ty, Josh is so lucky to have you in his life. My brother and I do not have a good relationship at all, and I yearn for the kind of relationship you have with Josh."

"Well anytime you need a brother figure give me a call."

They finished up their lunch and Tyler was a few paces ahead of them as they headed to the car.

"He is so smitten with you," JC whispered in her ear.

"He's awesome. But it doesn't matter, cause I'm smitten with you." She gave him a peck on the cheek and grabbed his hand as they made their way to the car.

-------

JC had never had so much fun at a baseball game in his life, nor had he ever met a woman so knowledgable about the game. She could spout off statistics not only from the Twins, but from the Angels as well. "You think this is impressive, wait until I take you to a hockey game," she'd said. JC found it ridiculously sexy. He also loved that it implied future outings.

The Twins ended up losing, but it didn't matter. They had a blast being some of the few people in their section cheering for the Twins. They sat in the row right behind the Twins dugout, so whey they cheered the players could usually hear them and would turn around to acknowldege them. They drank a few beers, ate hot dogs, shared some nachos and ended up with ice cream cones. In their matching navy shirts and baseball caps, JC couldn't help but imagine how many people in the country were doing this exact same thing tonight. He adored the sense of normalcy she brought to his life.

After the game her friend Pat sent her a text message asking if they wanted to go out for drinks. They ended up at a little dive bar not far from the stadium and they talked and joked over a few more beers. JC could tell that Hannah and Pat were close, but he definitely got a brother and sister vibe from them. Pat was a cool guy and JC was glad that they had a chance to hang out. He could definitely picture himself hanging out with him more often. He wondered if all of her friends were this easy to hang out with, because his certainly weren't.

It was about midnight when he finally pulled into his garage and was relieved to see both Tyler's and Evan's cars missing. Hannah yawned loudly as he shut off the engine.

"Oh no, you can't be tired yet," he said playfully.

"I've been up for almost 24 hours. I think I'm allowed to be tired."

"Well you're going to miss all of the fun tonight."

She turned to him and ran a hand over his cheek. "I guess I'll just have to have a Coke then."

"Come on. Let's go inside."

When they made it inside, JC headed straight to the kitchen to get Hannah a Coke.

"You mean business," she laughed, as she popped the top and took a big gulp. As she was setting down the can, he walked over and pinned her between his body and the island counter.

"You have no idea how sexy it is to hear you ramble off on-base percentages and ERAs." He started kissing her neck.

She let out a hearty guffaw. "Oh yeah, nothing sexier than that."

"I'm serious." His hands slid up the front of her shirt and tickled her stomach.

"Well you look ultra sexy in that hat." Her voice took on a husky tone.

"So do you." He reached up and slid her cap off and set it on the counter next to her Coke. His fingers picked at her hairband, slowly pulling it out. "You look sexier with your hair down though." He laced his fingers through her hair, which had gotten frizzy and curly in spots due to the heat. He took his hat off so the bill wouldn't knock her in the forehead and kissed her passionately, pushing their bodies together against the island.

"You're not wasting any time," she huffed between kisses.

"Do you want to waste time?" He panted.

"No. I've been thinking about this since the top of the first."

"Mmm, I love it when you talk dirty baseball to me." He grinned against her lips as she burst out laughing.

"C'mon, let's go upstairs." She took his hand in his as she led him up the stairs to his room. When they entered she shut the door behind them and they sat down at the foot of the bed.

"I want to thank you for today. I'm having such a great time out here. I'm not going to want to leave on Monday."

He rubbed the top of her hands with this thumbs. "Let's not go there right now."

"I know I shouldn't but I can't help..." She hiccuped a bit as she tried to fight off tears. She took a deep breath and started again. "I don't want this to sound corny, but I know it will. And I don't want it to scare you, but it may. It scares me. But I've never felt about any one the way I feel about you. I just can't imagine what it is going to be like going back to Minnesota and not seeing you everyday."

What she said did scare him, and he felt the same way. But he wasn't ready to admit it yet. So he showed her his feelings the only way he knew how.

He gently ran his palm over her cheek and she leaned into him. His other hand combed through her long hair as he leaned in and kissed her softly. She sat there passively as he continued to kiss her mouth and started to work his way down her chin to her neck. She moaned softly as he nipped and licked at the skin where the column of her neck met her shoulder. She arched her neck to the side to grant him more access. His hands slipped down to rub her stomach through her tank and her breath hitched when he slid his hand up to caress her breast.

Whatever playfulness they had in the kitchen was lost. The mood in the room was oddly serious all of the sudden.

He continued the assault on her neck and began to lift up the hem of her shirt.

"JC, look at me," she breathed.

His looked up and his eyes met hers. She grabbed his face and locked eyes with him. "I want this so much," she groaned before pulling him into a deep kiss. He moaned against her. The feeling of her tongue rubbing against his was amazing.

He continued to lift her shirt up and they pulled apart so he could get it over her head and toss it aside. They resumed kissing as he reached behind her to unclasp her bra. As he slid it down her shoulders he gently pushed her back so she was laying on the bed. He kneeled over her and looked at the sight below him. Her eyes were heavily lidded and she took deep breaths, causing her chest to heave. Her lips were swollen and wet from kissing. She looked beautiful.

"I can't remember the last time I was this turned on," she moaned.

He reached down to unbutton her shorts and he slowly pulled them down her legs. He could barely take the sight of her laying there in only her white boyshorts, on which he could make out a faint wet patch.

"Are you going to do something or just stare at me?"

"Staring is good." He slid his hand down to rub himself through his jeans. She groaned.

"Take your clothes off and get over here."

That was all he needed. He whipped his shirt over his head and fumbled with his pants.

"All of it." She demanded when he was down to his boxers.

He hesitated for a moment but pulled those off as well.

"Yes," she hissed as he crawled over her and kissed her hard. "Oh my God we should have done this sooner." She moaned between kisses.

"But then it wouldn't have felt as good. Not as much build up," he growled between kisses and slid down her body and took one of her nipples between his lips. She moaned as she arched her back of the mattress to lean into him. He continued his assult on her chest and gently rubbed his fingers over the wet spot on her underwear.

"Ahh," she nearly sobbed with pleasure. "This isn't fair. Let me touch you."

He ignored her request as he slid his tongue down her torso. He slid off the bed and knelt on the floor at the foot of the bed and pulled her forward so her legs hung over the edge. He leaned forward and very lightly ran his tounge over her underwear.

"Oh my God!" She moaned.

He pulled her underwear off and lifted her right leg to sit on his shoulder. He leaned in and placed a lazy open mouth kiss over her most sensitive of areas. Her leg tightened against his back in an attempt to pull him closer. He made his tongue taut and slowly slid it inside of her. He loved listening to her quickening breathing. He pulled back for a moment and slid a finger inside of her. He resumed his actions with his mouth and gently brushed her clit with his moistened finger.

"Jace, Jace stop!" She panted. "This isn't, this isn't how I want to..."

He finally pulled away and slid up her body and resumed kissing her. She reached down between them and rubbed him intimately.

"Nobody has ever made me feel that good."

"You say that to all the guys."

She used both hands to force him to look her in the eyes. "I'm not joking." She said in all seriousness, forcing them to maintain eye contact. "Only you," she moaned before kissing him again. After a few minutes of kissing JC pulled away and crawled over to his nightstand to grab a condom. After a few moments he slid it on, and looked down at her and ran a reassuring hand over her cheek.

"Are you sure?"

She nodded. "Roll over though. I want to be on top."

He was going to make a joke about her being demanding, but he realized it was a sensitive moment and didn't. He laid back and she straddled him, slowly sliding down onto him. They both groaned.

"Sit up," she panted. He did so and she wrapped her legs around him, locking her ankles at his back. She moaned loudly with the change of angle. They slid their arms around each others' necks and rested their foreheads against each other as they slowly started their rhythm.

"Hannah, ugh," JC grunted.

She held onto him tighter as she rolled her hips against his faster. "JC it's so good. Ugh...I don't think anyone has ever been this deep before."

They kept like this for a few minutes before JC started kissing her. "I love kissing during sex," he mumbled.

"Me too. Why do you think I wanted this position?" she managed to squeak out between kisses. She moaned loudly with release when JC snaked his hand between them and rubbed her clit. Somehow through the quaking she managed to clench her walls around him and he followed shortly after her.

They sat there for a moment, taking everything in and kissing each other gently. Hannah rubbed her thumbs over his eyebrows, removing the sweat that had formed there. "Hannah, I've never..." he wasn't sure how to continue.

"Shh," she whispered. "Just hold me."

I nailed it :)


duh.


They asked me to speak at a regional conference in Chicago next month.


you're awesome.


What are you doing tonight?


studio. you?


Drinks with a few people I met today.


sounds fun.


I guess. Can't wait until tomorrow :)


Me either. See you then :)

------

JC pulled up to the hotel to find Hannah sitting on a bench not far from where he dropped her off two nights prior. He hoped she recognized his car because this hotel was usually swarming with paparazzi and the last thing he wanted to do was get out of the car and deal with that. Thankfully, she did recognize him and he popped the trunk for her.

"Sorry. I would have helped you with your bag, but there are usually paps all over this place."

"Don't worry about it. I can lift my own suitcase." She breathed deeply and leaned against the headrest as JC sped away. "I'm so glad this is over. It was great, but I'm ready to relax. I need a nap."

"I need a nap, too. Is that what's first on our agenda? A nap?"

"Yes please. If you're sure you don't mind." She paused. "Hey, you look snazzy today. Why the suit?"

JC sighed as he merged onto the highway. "I um...I had a meeting with my lawyer."

"Why do you sound guilty of something."

"It was a secret meeting. My manager should have been there. But I didn't tell him about it."

"What's going on? I mean, you don't have to tell me. I'm sure its..."

"I'm trying to get out of my contract with Jive."

"Oh."

"I'm just trying to get a feel for what my options are before I talk to Eric about it."

"Wow, that's a huge deal."

"I know. But I'm kind of at a loss about what to do anymore. Its complicated. Anyway, I'm drained and don't really feel like talking about it anymore."

"No problem."

They sat in silence for the next twenty minutes before Hannah spoke up.

"We look like bankers or something in our matching suits."

JC let out a hearty laugh. "We do, don't we?"

------

After giving Hannah a tour of his home, JC changed into a pair of basketball shorts and a T-shirt and collapsed on top of his king-sized bed. He felt kind of bad that he finally had Hannah at his house and all he wanted to do was sleep. But the feeling was mutual.

"Mind if I join you?" She appeared in the doorway.

Not what he was expecting.

"Um, no. Of course not."

"It feels so good to be out of that suit. It has been far too long since I've been been able to wear shorts. You'll have to ignore my pasty legs though. I'm not much into fake baking." JC scooted out of the center of the bed, and she crawled under the covers on the vacant side of the bed. JC gulped. Shit.

"I just thought this way we could chat before we fall asleep. I don't even know that I'll sleep. I just want to lay here."

"Why are you so tired?"

"I was up pretty late playing the piano in the lounge last night. A melody got stuck in my head and I had to get it out. It was great. I was the only one in there the whole time. Granted it was 3:00 a.m." She laughed.

"Yeah, I know the feeling." JC replied as he crawled under the covers on his side of the bed, making sure to leave a good foot and a half of space between them.

"Thanks for letting me stay here. It is a beautiful home. I've never stayed anywhere this nice. If this is what you're used to, I'm sorry you had to stay in my crappy apartment." She frowned. "Seriously, the whole thing would practically fit in this bedroom."

"You know I don't care about that shit, Hannah. I loved your place. It was so homey and lived in."

"I just feel bad that you had to sleep on my crappy college futon and I get to sleep in this awesome, soft bed."

JC's eyes widened with surprise.

"Don't look so alarmed. I didn't mean to say this bed. Just a bed. As opposed to a thin, hard mattress."

"You can stay in here if you want. I don't mind."

Hannah smiled as she settled into her pillow. "Question."

"Sure, Dwight." JC chuckled.

"What do you consider to be the defining moment of your life? Like, that one moment that just changed everything, and if wasn't for that moment, you wouldn't be where you are today."

JC rolled onto his side to face her. He rested his elbow on his pillow and his head in his hand, his other hand resting on the mattress in front of his chest.

"You ask heavy hitting questions."

"How else are you really going to get to know someone?"

"It is heavy hitting. But its easy. When my parents adopted me." Hannah raised her eyebrows but didn't say anything. She gave him a slight smile to gently urge him on. "I don't talk about it much, so bear with me. My mom used to be a social worker, and she and my dad were practically newlyweds when they decided to take in one of the teens my mom was working with. She spent a summer with them, and not long after she left, she found out she was pregnant. With me. She was only 16, but raised me for five years. There were times we didn't have anywhere to live. We hopped around from one friend to another. Finally she realized I needed something stable, and I needed to be in school, so she contacted my mom. The only person she knew could help."

Hannah slid her right hand into his, and interlocked their fingers, still listening intently.

"My mom and dad adopted me when I was five, even though they already had a three year old, and my mom was pregnant. When I said my mom was incredible, that's pretty much what I was referencing."

Hannah gave his hand a gentle squeeze and her voice was almost a whisper. "I'm honored that you would say I remind you of her."

"I was serious. I see a lot of her in you."

Hannah gripped his hand tighter, scooted a few inches closer and closed her eyes. "Let's take a nap, huh?"

-------

Hannah smiled warmly at JC as he opened his eyes. He was acutely aware of the fact that their fingers were still intertwined.

"What time is it?" He mumbled in a gravelly voice while rubbing his eyes with his free hand.

"One," she chuckled.

"One? In the morning?"

"Um, yeah. Guess we needed more than a nap. It was what? Like 7:00 when we fell asleep? We practically had a full nights sleep."

"Jesus. When did you get up?"

"Like an hour ago. I was just content laying here thinking."

"You should have woken me up."

"You looked too cozy."

"I was very cozy. I just feel bad it is your first night here and we didn't do anything."

"Don't feel bad. I'm on vacation. I was hoping to relax, and I am certainly relaxed."

The air between them was thick. Even though they were only holding hands, the way they were laying felt extremely intimate. They lay in silence for a few minutes looking at each other with lazy smiles. If this kept up, JC was going to have to find a polite way to kick her out of his bed. His body was not agreeing with his decision to play the "just friends" card.

"I know you didn't ask, but I am going to answer a question I think you are too afraid to ask."

He gave her a puzzled look.

"I want to kiss you."

Not what he was expecting. But as she did to him earlier, he silently urged her on.

"I wanted to ever since you said you were willing to help me shovel. It was just so unexpected. I realized just how unaffected and kind you were in that moment. And then - ugh - you sent me that mp3 of your song. Do you know what that does to a girl?"

He loved how honest she was being with him right now, and she was saying everything he wanted to hear. But he wasn't sure how to respond.

"I just wanted to cheer you up," he replied.

"Why?"

"Because I knew you liked the song. And you told me about the shitty time you were having with your brother and I felt bad."

"But you wouldn't re-record a song just to cheer anyone up."

She had him there.

"No."

"No," she whispered back. She broke the grip on their hands and scooted closer to him. She laced her fingers in the short hairs at the base of his head.

"JC, we are so honest about everything else. Why can't we just be honest about this?"

"I don't want to mess it up," he responded quietly. "I always mess it up. Always. And I don't want to do that with you. I can't talk to anyone the way I talk to you. I can't let sex get in the way of that." Her hand traveled from his hair to his cheek. "What about you? If you wanted to kiss me that night why didn't you?"

"I didn't want to get attached. I didn't want to be your 'Minnesota girl.' I certainly didn't want to start anything long distance."

"Then why did you bring it up now?"

"When I was laying here watching you sleep, I just kept thinking about how much I already care about you. I realized I had two options. I could go home and be miserable because all I could think about was how much I missed you and wanted to kiss you. Or, I could go home and all I could think about was how much I missed you and wanted to kiss you again. Both options resulted in me being miserable, so I thought what the hell." Her thumb slid down from his cheek to caress his lips. "And you don't have to worry about sex getting in the way of our friendship."

"I don't?" His tongue brushed her thumb still on his lips as he spoke.

"No. Because its not sex, is it? It's more than that."

He nodded shyly.

And without noticing her move, suddenly their foreheads were touching.

"Jace?" She breathed.

He gulped. "Yeah?"

"We can't go back after this. You know that right? Are you OK with that?"

He answered with a mumbled 'yes' against her lips. She arched into him and slid her hand back into his hair as he slightly parted her lips with his tongue. She briefly brushed her tongue to his before he slid it down to gently to caress her bottom lip. He gently licked her lips for a moment before starting to pull back. As they parted, he caught her bottom lip between his teeth and gave a slight nibble.

She rolled onto her back with a groan.

"Shit. Oh my God. A million times better than I ever imagined."

"I know." He was amazed he could even speak. "Um. Wow. Um." He paused for a good fifteen seconds. "We should probably try to sleep a little longer, huh?"

"Um, yeah."

"You should probably go to your room."

"I probably should."

"Good, because I don't put out before the first date."

Hannah burst out laughing at his comment. It was nice to break the sexual tension that filled them both. "I suppose I don't either." She leaned over and give him a brief kiss on the mouth before she crawled out of bed. "But if you can't sleep, you know where to find me."

From: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
To: joshua.scott@gmail.com
Date: April 16, 2007 at 9:24 a.m.
Subject: Re:re: :)

I did it! I confirmed my participation in the IBOA Conference! I will be flying in on Wednesday afternoon, and I present first thing Thursday morning. I'm ridiculously nervous. It still five days away and the the butterflys in my tummy are fluttering away! I never feel comfortable talking in front of people. You should have seen me when I had to present my thesis and business plan to my professors to get my MBA. Oy. Anyway, at least I am comfortable with the topic - How To Stand Out Amongst the Rapidly Growing Competition From National Chains. Whoo hoo, exciting stuff, isn't it?!

I was thinking that I would stay for the weekend. After my presentation on Thursday I am technically done, though I may attend a few sessions on Friday. I haven't been to L.A. in a few years though, and would love the chance to soak up some sun. If you're around this weekend, I would love to see you. I really didn't think I'd be seeing you soon (or ever)! Oh, and is there a hotel near your place? I'm staying at the conference hotel on Wednesday and Thursday, but figured that for the weekend I would want to stay someplace closer to your house.

And I haven't forgotten that I owe you a question. Who do you admire most in your life?

Alright - I'd better go work on my presentation. Ugh :p

-h.

-----------

From: joshua.scott@gmail.com
To: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
Date: April 16, 2007 at 12:03 p.m.
Subject: UMM??

Hell no, there aren't any hotels around my house! For fucks sake, you're staying with me. Besides, I certainly owe you lodging and first class accommodations!

I'm free on Wednesday afternoon/evening, so I was thinking maybe I could meet you at the hotel and we could grab dinner or something. I don't think I would last until Friday night knowing you're in town and not being able to see you. Maybe sushi? The only other plan I have for this weekend is a party at my manager Eric's place on Saturday night, but other than that, I would be happy to be your LA tour guide.

I don't have a lot of time right now - more frustrating meetings with my label, which I'm sure I'll bitch to you about soon enough - but my mom. I'm sure you'll hear me gush about her more, but here's the short version. She is the strongest, most open and loving person I've ever known. She has an amazing career which she has always been able to balance perfectly with her family. She has never been afraid to take chances or help somebody in need. I owe her everything. My dad too, of course - but my mom...she's just incredible.
.
.
.
You remind me a lot of her.

Anyway, I'm saving my real question for dinner on Wednesday (we get to play our 'tell a secret' game in person!), but here is an easy one - what is your favorite song lyric of all time?

-c.

-------

From: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
To: joshua.scott@gmail.com
Date: April 16, 2007 at 9:24 a.m.
Subject: Re: UMM??

Seriously - are you trying to get me in the sack or something? You keep saying these ridiculously sweet things to me.

Dinner on Wednesday sounds perfect. And I suppose you can expect a houseguest on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday (I'm flying out on Monday morning, I hope that's ok.)

And dude - favorite song lyric of all time? That is not an easy fucking question!! There are so many things to take into consideration. For instance, of all the song topics, what is the most important? Something happy and uplifting? Something ridiculously sexy? Something heartwrenching? Something political? How do you compare and choose one?

Because I'm a cheater, I've come up with two. You'll just have to deal with it. I'll list them and you decide which category they belong in :)

"Made my bed and I sleep like a baby, with no regrets and I don't mind saying, its a sad, sad story when her mother would teach her, daughter that she ought to hate a perfect stranger, and how in the world could the things that I said, send somebody so over the edge, that they'd write me a letter, saying that I'd better, shut up and sing or my life would be over?" - Not Ready to Make Nice by the Dixie Chicks. I wish I could write something that powerful.

and

"What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way, What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you, What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way, What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you and, I wanna fall in love, with you" - I'm not so sure its the lyrics as much as it is Chris Issak ;)

I'm saving your question for Wednesday.

-h.

-------

From: joshua.scott@gmail.com
To: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
Date: April 16, 2007 at 10:01 a.m.
Subject: Re:re:re: UMM??

Jesus fucking Christ, are YOU trying to get me in the sack or something? You can't just go around spouting off lyrics to "Wicked Game!"

-------

From: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
To: joshua.scott@gmail.com
Date: April 16, 2007 at 11:09 a.m.
Subject: Re:re:re:re: UMM??

Sure I can ;)

-------

It had been a tension-filled five days for JC, to say the least. Jive had decided to pull "Until Yesterday" from the radio airplay lists (not that it had gotten any radio airplay), and replace it with "You Ruined Me." JC loved the song, but knew it was next to impossible to make any impact with a ballad as your first single. And with more than three years since his last album, it certainly felt like a first single. Deep down he knew this would be another let down and he didn't know how he would handle it. He was at his wits end with Jive. He wanted to go tell them all to fuck off, take "Kate" and run. But Eric kept insisting it was the best deal out there. And Eric was not only his manager, but his friend. And he had to trust that he was making the right decisions.

The movie needed another reshoot from the leads, and would be pushed back another four months, at least.

He sent Tony a birthday card, hoping that extending that olive branch would be a start. But there had been no response.

The one good thing in his life right now was Hannah. Which was strange because he had only spent a day with her. But her e-mails and random text messages had become the highlight of his days. He checked his e-mails every half hour sometimes, hoping to hear from her. Why they invented phones with internet he would never know. His BlackBerry was turning him into a dependent little puppy dog. He hated it.

They hadn't spoken much since their flirtatious little e-mail exchange, and that was causing him tension for different reasons. Cold showers and pathetic ruts against the sheets at night were not proving effective. His inability to control his feelings for her was getting ridiculous. She made him feel like he was 14 all over again.

But no matter how much he wanted her, he was going to try his damndest to ignore it. Or at least wait for her to come to him. He did not want to mess this up. And once he slept with someone, he always messed it up. It was his pattern. It was inevitable, really. He wasn't having much luck controlling other things in his life right now. He was going to control this.

He saw her the moment he handed his keys to the valet. She was sitting at an outdoor table outside of his favorite Japanese restuarant. It was a hidden gem, and he was more grateful than ever that he had never seen any paparazzi around the area. She was wearing a black wrap dress and her long, dark hair was pulled back into a sleek ponytail. She looked classy and elegant, completely different than she did in her jeans and T-shirt that day in the bar. This wasn't going to be easy.

When he finally reached the table, she remained seated. She looked up at him and smiled, and he look down at her and smiled. Finally, after too many tortuous seconds she stood up and squealed, wrapping her arms around him tightly.

"I can't believe I'm in California. I'm so excited!"

Not exactly the first words he was hoping to hear out of her mouth.

"It is so great to see you, Hannah. Has it really only been two weeks?" She tried to pull away but he squeezed her tighter.

"Oh JC, it is so great to see you too." When they finally pulled away she ran a hand over his slighly stubbled cheek. "Are you OK?"

He needed to shake off whatever funk he was in. She was noticing.

"Yeah, yeah - fine." They took a seat and the waitress came by and took their drink orders. "You look amazing, Hannah. Really. I barely recognized you!"

"Well I'm in the big city now. I need to step up my game. Can't traipse around LA in my old hockey T-shirts," she laughed. "I like having a reason to get dressed up sometimes. And you, well you look good when you're not wearing oversized winter outerwear."

He chuckled. "Thanks."

"So you know that we haven't even talked since you left? I mean, e-mails and stuff, but we haven't spoken. Weird, huh."

"I was going to call you that first day we were texting, but then Justin showed up and I didn't get a chance."

"I know that I've said this a lot, and you're probably sick of hearing it, but I'm so glad we are friends. I felt it you know, some strange connection that we had but I wasn't sure how to convince you to call me. I didn't want to sound like some crazy." He would never tire of hearing that.

"I know. I can't remember the last time I became such fast friends with someone. I can't remember the last time I told people some of the stuff I've told you."

"I don't have many friends around Minneapolis anymore. I mean a few, but lots of them have moved away for work, or gotten married and ignore me now, you know - the usual. Most of my time is spent working, or with my mom, or dealing with my dumbass brother, so being able to e-mail you at the end of the day really cheers me up."

"Same here. My career is on the verge of a breakdown right now, and I'm dealing with some fucked up situations with some friends of mine. Its definitely a rough patch. I think we met at the right time."

"Indeed."

The waitress delievered their drinks and they placed their order. They shared an order of edamame as Hannah told JC about the flight and her presentation. Even though she shrugged it off as uninteresting, JC really did want to know about her presentation. Regardless of what she said, it was interesting. He didn't know too many women who had the opportunity to present at professional conferences, and it was fascinating to him. He remembered when his mom used to rehearse her presentations in front of him. He loved it, and to be honest, Hannah's topic was much more interesting than the fertilizer-related presentations his mom gave.

"So its first thing in the morning then?"

"Yeah. Oh my God, I'm going to need a liter of coffee before going in there."

He reached his hand across the table and took her hand in his. He gently rubbed circles on the skin above her thumb. "You'll be great."

She sighed deeply and gave his hand a squeeze. "I know I will."

The waitress brought a large tray of nigiri and maki sushi, and JC and Hannah dug in, enjoying the assortment of fresh, spicy, and buttery flavors. They joked an laugh with ease. Any worries JC had of the evening being awkward were swept away.

An hour and a half had passed before they took care of the bill. JC offered to pay, but Hannah insisted they split it. Her reasoning was that he was letting her stay at his place, she could pay her half of the bill. JC thought maybe it seemed less like a date if they shared the cost.

Hannah glanced at her watch. "Wow, its 9:00 already. I really need to get back to the hotel and practice, and get to sleep soon. I need to get up at 6:00. Can't wait." She gave a lazy smile.

"Let me drive you back to your hotel."

They rode in silence with the windows down and the warm breeze caressing their faces.

"Mmm," Hannah moaned, then inhaled deeply. "I could get used to this."

For a moment JC let himself imagine she meant spending evenings with him, and not the mild weather.

He pulled up in front of the hotel a few minutes later and turned off the engine.

"Good luck tomorrow. You won't need it, but if it makes you feel better I'll say it."

"It does. Thank you," she paused. "I signed up for a few more sessions for tomorrow afternoon and Friday morning. I'll be done Friday around 3. Should I call you then? I can grab a taxi to your place or something."

"It's no problem. Just call me and I'll come pick you up."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course. Really, its no big deal. I'll probably be down here for another meeting anyway."

"Ok, well. I will see you then I guess. Thank you for dinner. See you Friday." She gave his hand a gentle squeeze as she climbed out of the car.

"Hey, wait!" She poked her head through the open window. "We forgot to ask our questions tonight!"

"Friday."

"Friday," she repeated. She turned and gave a small wave as she entered the hotel, the breeze slightly blowing her skirt to mid-thigh.

With a sigh, JC let his forehead hit the steering wheel.

JC sat on his patio nursing a bottle of beer and stared out at the hills below. It was hard to believe that two days ago he was digging out of 15 inches of snow, and now he sat here in shorts and a tank basking in the California sun. It was hard to believe his time in Minnesota even happened. It was all so surreal.

How he could miss someone so much after only 24 hours he didn't know. But in some way, he felt he knew Hannah better than any of the people he had been hanging around with for the past few years. He had been alienating himself. He knew it. The people he had been hanging out with were party friends. Hangers-on. People who liked him for his celebrity. They weren't people who really knew him on a personal level. They weren't people he would have deep and endless conversations with.

There were only three people in his life that he felt he could tell anything to. One was his brother Tyler. Ty knew everything about him. One was Justin - but they had slowly been rebuilding their friendship after a few shaky years, and they weren't quite back to that level yet. The other was Tony. But after JC's drunken antics, they hadn't talked in a few months. It killed JC, but he wasn't sure how to fix what he had done; so he took the easy way out and avoided the situation all together.

And suddenly, out of nowhere, he felt he could add Hannah Janssen to that short list of people.

He never wanted to add a woman to that list before. He wanted to sleep with them and then send them on their way after a few months. He never wanted to be friends with them. And he wouldn't lie - he did want to sleep with Hannah. But if sleeping with her meant he couldn't be her friend, it wasn't worth it.

"Oh fuck it. Just suck it up Chasez and talk to her."

JC grabbed his phone off of the side table and brought up her number. His fingers nimbly typed a text message. Its 80 degrees and sunny here. Not a snowflake in sight.

There. He had done it. He contacted her.

He set the phone back down and took a deep swig of his beer. He closed his eyes as a warm breeze washed over him. His phone buzzed.

Not one in sight here either. It is 60 and all the snow melted. Hi :)

Oh God. Was she flirting with him? 'No Chasez, just saying hi dumbass.'

Hi :) MN is odd

Thats why I love it

It had been two minutes and they'd already exchanged four text messages. JC was about to just give her a call when his doorbell rang.

His phone buzzed again, but he didn't get to respond.

I never actually expected you to contact me

--------------------

JC never got a chance to text Hannah back. Justin unexpectedly showed up at his door and they bounced around some ideas for a few new songs. Now it was two days later and JC felt like scum for not getting back to her. Especially when she told him that she didn't expect him to contact her.

He sighed deeply, and dug her business card out of his wallet. He sat down at his studio computer and decided to send her an e-mail. It was easier than calling her. He wasn't sure why he was such a coward all of the sudden.

From: joshua.scott@gmail.com
To: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
Date: April 5, 2007 at 10:58 p.m.
Subject: none

I'm really sorry I never texted you back the other day. Justin stopped over and we were working on some songs...Anyway, I could have taken a few seconds to write you. I don't want you to think I'm a jerk, and I don't want you to think I wouldn't contact you. I couldn't just ignore you after what you did for me.

I've decided that every time we e-mail each other, we tell each other something about us. And not something like, "my favorite color is blue" (which it is), or "my favorite food is sushi" (which it also is). But something real. Something important.

And since I don't really have a question, I'll just try to think of something you might want to know...

I finally realized that I happy NSYNC never got back together. The media, and us to be honest, blamed Justin. We were upset with him for years. But when I really think about it, I'm glad we were done when we were. I'm not mad at Justin anymore, in fact, he always has and always will be one of my closest friends. I told him that when he was here the other day - that he was right, and he made the right decision. He almost looked like he was going to cry. He came over and hugged me - and not one of those manly, pat-on-the-back hugs. A real hug. I knew it meant a lot to him, because he's still on shaky ground with the other guys. I don't think any of the others have told him "You did the right thing." There is still a lot of blame there.

I'm not sure why I felt the need to share that, but for some reason I did.

Anyway, here is your question. Who is that one person in your family that you don't really like, but you act like you do because they are family? I know you have one, we all do.

OK, that's all for now. Talk to you soon.

-C

---------

From: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
To: joshua.scott@gmail.com
Date: April 6, 2007 at 3:06 a.m.
Subject: Re: none

OMG, YOU HUGGED JT! AHH! j/k ;)

I was not expecting to come home to such a serious e-mail when I got done with work this evening. I guess in a way I feel honored that you would share this with me, that you would be so honest. I don't know what it is that makes you want to talk to me, but I like it. I haven't been able to really talk to anyone in a very long time, so I'm glad we found each other. I think it is great that you and Justin are building you friendship back up. I just assumed you were still tight after that picture I saw from your birthday, but trust me - I understand there is a difference between hanging out with someone and really having a solid friendship, and I'm happy to hear that you and Justin are getting that back. I'm honored that you would trust these secrets to me. I want you to know that nothing you ever tell me will leave this computer or my mind. These secrets are ours to keep. I just know how awful it must be to never know if you can really trust someone. And I'm not sure if I can convince you, but I want you to know I will never share them with anyone.

I'm a little tipsy and kind of rambling.

But to answer your question - man, this will make me sound like a horrible person, but its the truth - I don't like my brother. I put on a good act of course, and people ask about him all of the time because he's in Iraq. We never had much in common except for hockey, and when I quit playing our relationship became even rockier. Then two years ago, I lost all respect for him. Jens was always fighting for attention from our father. He felt that dad loved me more, cared about my hockey career more, etc., even though that wasn't true. But Jens always felt he needed to impress our dad. Now my dad was a huge conservative and a big supporter of the war. I am adamantly against the war, and Jens was too. But when dad got sick...wow, I've never told anyone this before...when dad got sick, Jens joined the Army as a way to finally make dad proud of him. And it worked of course. My dad was so proud that Jens was in the service, but it makes me sick inside to know that Jens went against everything he believed in just to make dad love him. Ever since dad died, Jens and I don't really speak much, even though we own this bar together. In fact, I got a letter from him the other day that said, "Mom said you are selling artwork at the bar now. You know dad would hate that. That hippy-dippy shit better be gone when I get back." That is all it said.

Um yeah. So there is my secret. Want to know another secret? I bought your cd. "Lose Myself" is stunning, but nothing beats the stripped-down, live version :)

My brain is too fried to think of a question right now. I will e-mail you in a couple of days.

-Hannah

P.S. I love purple and my favorite food is sushi, too :)
-----------

JC sat in shock as he read Hannah's e-mail. He never in a million years thought she would be so open and honest with him. He wanted nothing more to wrap her in his arms right now. She had told him that her dad died, and that her brother was in Iraq, but he had no idea of heartache she was going through. He expected her to say she didn't really care for her Aunt Phyllis because she forced Hannah to eat her disgusting deviled eggs. Or her Uncle Jack because he smelled bad. Not this. He needed to do something for her. Something that would make her smile through all of this pain.

-----------

From: joshua.scott@gmail.com
To: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
Date: April 10, 2008 at 4:26 p.m.
Subject: Re:re: none
Attachements: 1

I recorded it just for you. I hope it brings a smile to your face.

attach: losemyself-stripped.mp3

-----------

From: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
To: joshua.scott@gmail.com
Date: April 11, 2007 at 1:35 a.m.
Subject: Re:re:re: none
Attachements: 1

That is the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me. I would hug you right now if I could.

I've attached the wall 'o celebrity picture for you. We look adorable if I may say so myself.

----------

JC smiled as he sat down at his computer and glanced at the picture sloppily taped above the monitor. Hannah was right. They looked damn adorable. He need to remember to take it down though. Justin was coming over in a few hours to work on a song, and he wasn't quite ready to share Hannah with anyone yet.

Five new e-mails. He sighed. One was from someone at Jive and he wasn't ready to read it. In fact, he was dreading it. He knew it wasn't going to be good.

It was easy to ignore because there was one from Hannah - even though technically it was his turn to respond.

From: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
To: joshua.scott@gmail.com
Date: April 15, 2007 at 6:34 p.m.
Subject: :)

I've been asked to be a speaker at the Independent Bar Owners Association conference next week because someone backed out at the last minute. It is in L.A. Do you think I should accept? :)

--------------

From: joshua.scott@gmail.com
To: hjanssen@janssenspub.net
Date: April 15, 2007 at 7:06 p.m.
Subject: Re: :)

Absolutely, I do.

He wandered around Hannah's tiny apartment as she chopped ingredients for a side salad. He couldn't imagine living in such a small space. The kitchen was actually a decent size, but it also served as a dining room which really made it feel cluttered. There was hardly any counter space. He strolled into her living room and he was pretty sure it was smaller than his closet. There was enough room for an old futon, recliner and a TV stand, and that was about it. Off of the living room was a tiny little room that actually may have been a closet at one time, but Hannah made it into to a little office. There was a desk with her laptop, a few books, and her degrees hanging on the wall.

"Finding anything interesting?"

JC looked alarmed for a moment, but quickly realized Hannah was just teasing him. There was her warm smile, again. Did she know the effect that was having on him?

"Just admiring your education. You have your MBA?"

"I do. Got my undergrad in Accounting, took two years off to play hockey, then went back for my MBA. I have a business to run, you know." She paused. "You look surprised or something."

"I just don't meet a lot of well-educated women, I guess. Most of the women I meet are models or actresses - and not the kind that went to college to study the art of acting. Just girls relying on their pretty face. You're a breath of fresh air."

"Well, thanks. I think. Our late lunch slash extremely early dinner is ready. Again, I'm sorry its not much. I don't do much cooking so all I really had was a frozen pizza and salad."

"You chopped vegetables. That's more cooking than I ever do." JC said while emphasizing cooking with air quotes.

The pair sat at the crowded table in the kitchen and ate their salad and pizza with a glass of red wine.

"So, did you go to college?"

"I barely went to high school." Hannah looked surprised. "I mean, I had a tutor and everything, just not the normal high school experience. I wish I would have had a chance to go to college, though. I still think about it sometimes."

"You do? I mean, clearly you wouldn't need to go to college. You have a great career."

"Its not about the career aspect. Its about the experience I sometimes feel like I missed out on. Studying, having roommates, going to parties and football games..."

"I can see that. Those were some of the best times of my life. But think of all the experiences you've had that others didn't get to have. You've seen the world multiple times over and have gotten to do what you love at a young age."

"I know. I'm very blessed, and I wouldn't have changed the way everything happened. But its still one of those "what if" things, you know?"

"Yeah, we all have those," she answered. "So we've talked a lot about me. I want to learn more about you."

He took a long swig of his wine. "Not to sound self-centered, but what do you already know?"

"Let's see. That you sing and that you had a birthday last year," she laughed. "Sorry, I can't say I was a big fan. I was, of course, aware of your group, but it was never really my thing."

JC loved it when people didn't already have preconceived notions of who he was or what he was about. He could tell that Hannah honestly wanted to know about him, and was not just digging for gossip. He went into the brief version of his background, and though Hannah was listening intently, he could sense boredom in her eyes when he mentioned "famous friends" or anything of the like. She poured them both another glass of wine as her briefly told her about the movie and his current struggles with Jive.

"That's exactly why I don't want to pursue this music thing. Other than my fear of singing, of course."

"Well it sucks, yeah. But I don't think that's a reason not to try. You're great. If you're really interested in pursuing this songwriting thing..."

She interrupted. "No. I'm not, its just a hobby. If I ever got involved in the music world in any way, it would be from the business end of things. Put my degrees to use, and try to change the way companies treated their talent. But, that's one of my "what ifs." I own this place now, and I have no intentions of doing anything else."

Even though he wanted to push the idea of her getting into the business more, he decided to ease up. He could tell it was a touchy subject, but he hadn't yet figured out why.

"Hannah, I just wanted to thank you again, for everything you've done for me today. It was beyond kind, and I am very grateful."

Hannah looked at him and smiled. The wine had lightly stained his lips and she couldn't help but stare. For the first time that day she felt uncomfortable, and she couldn't explain it. The air held a new charge.

"You're welcome," she nearly whispered.

He sensed the change in her demeanor, and suddenly he felt slightly uncomfortable, as well.

"Can I help you clean up?"

"Can you start the dishes while I get your bed ready? I need to change the sheets and stuff."

"Of course."

JC sighed. Suddenly she couldn't get away from him fast enough.

**********************

Hannah had returned with her arms full of blankets and pillows, and she dropped them to the futon with soft thump.

"So I have an extra bedroom but it only has a twin bed, so I thought the futon might give you a little extra room. Is that OK? Its not the most comfortable, but it works for a night."

"Of course, that's fine. Seriously, I would sleep on the floor."

"Well no need for that. Here, come help me get this mattress down."

After they adjusted the mattress, JC gently pushed Hannah away and grabbed the sheets out of her hands. "Seriously, you go sit down. I will take care of this."

She looked at him exasperatedly, but her face soon lit up with a smile as she took a seat on the old recliner. "I guess I could let you do that."

Whatever tension had been in the air earlier had seemed to drain.

"You know its only like 5:15. Are you trying to make me go to bed to get out of your hair already?" JC asked as he tucked a pillow into its case.

"I just figured it would be nice to have it all made up, so when you get tired you can just fall asleep, and not have to worry about all of the work then," she paused. "Speaking of work, would you mind helping me shovel? I know its still snowing, but I'd like to get some of the snow removed so it isn't twice as bad tomorrow."

"I haven't shoveled in probably 20 years. But yeah, of course I'll help."

Hannah chuckled. "Oh California boys."

"And before that it was Florida. But I grew up in DC. We got a little bit of snow every now and then. Nothing like this though."

"Well trust me, you'll probably have a backache by the time we're done. But I'll make you some hot chocolate to make up for it. I have an old jacket of my dad's and some boots you can wear. You can't quite go out in that windbreaker and those nice leather shoes."


******

"I'll say it again, I do not understand why people live here. That was ridiculous," Jc whined as he walked into the bar and tugged his hat off, while stomping the excess snow off of his boots.

"Wait!" Hanna shouted when JC started to unzip the oversized parka he was wearing. "You will be dressed in full snow gear for you 'wall 'o celebrity' picture. Don't think I've forgotten about it." Hannah pushed past him and ran behind the bar to grab the camera.

"You're trailing snow everywhere."

"I don't care. Quit trying to change the subject." Hanna grabbed the camera and hurried back to JC's side. "Put your hat back on."

"You're demanding."

"I know. Do it."

JC reluctantly did as told and slipped the knit cap over his head. He zipped up his coat and wrapped his scarf around his neck, purposely pulling up on it so it covered all the way up to his nose. "You won't even be able to recognize me."

"I know, that is why we are taking it now. You wanted to go unnoticed today, so you will. I wanted to get your photo for the wall, so I will. It's a win-win."

"Win."

"Oh my God, and "Office" reference? You can never leave. Besides, you look adorable in all of that winter gear," Hannah said as she snapped a photo of the two of them with her outstretched hand. They both reviewed the photo on the screen, and Hanna looked up at JC and smiled. "Perfect."

"OK, you can take all of that old crap off now. Just throw it on the floor. It is all wet. We'll pick it up in the morning," Hannah commented as she stripped off her jacket, hat and boots and threw them in a haphazzard pile on the floor.

"Remind me again why you don't have a snowblower?"

"I do, but it is broken. It is at my uncle's farm getting fixed. I told him there was no rush because I was really hoping I wasn't going to need it again this season. Clearly, I'm a moron."

"Well shoveling sucks. My back is killing me. That is heavy fucking snow."

"Perfect for snowball fights!"

"Yeah, I got that when you pelted me in the face with one."

"I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to hit you in the face, I swear."

"Yeah, but you were still trying to hit me!"

"Well of course."

JC slipped off his left boot, and stood quietly in his black T-shirt, loose jeans, and wet socks. He watched Hannah head off behind the bar and started mixing drinks. He stood in awe of her for a few minutes. He couldn't believe this woman. He had never met anyone like her. She was funny, smart, normal - and it was extremely refreshing. She was cute, too - he couldn't ignore that - but that was not what drew him in. It was her openness. He met very few people who were so warm and welcoming. He felt like he had known her for years, but it had only been short of 11 hours.

"Here." She handed him a steaming mug. "Hot chocolate with Baileys and Butterscotch Schnapps. It's my favorite." They headed over to the bar and next to each other on the stools. "Thanks again for your help. You are are a real gentleman. And I know it will seem like we did it in vain in an hour or so after the sidewalk will be covered with snow again, but it will really make it easier on me in the morning."

"No problem. It was fun, even though my back is sore. I never work those lower back muscles. Not like that anyway."

They sat in silence for awhile, slowly sipping their hot chocolate and enjoying the quiet. Finally, JC spoke up. "I still need to play something for you." JC set his empty mug on the bar and headed toward the piano bench. "That hot chocolate was amazing by the way."

"Thanks! It is a staple in my winter diet. After February I usually make myself stop drinking it, but I think today called for it." Hannah smiled. "You really don't have to play anything for me."

"Rubbish. A deal is a deal."

JC inhaled deeply and took a seat on the piano bench. He was strangely nervous,and he was never nervous. He didn't usually sing for girls - he kind of thought it was hokey. Not that Hannah was some girl he was trying to get into bed, but still in this moment that is how it felt. He managed to convince himself that he was just one musician performing for another musician. There was nothing more.

A soft and simple melody began to fill the empty bar, and a after a few bars of introduction, JC closed his eyes and began to sing.

She loves daffodils/ she keeps them on her windowsill/ when the wind blows the smell fills the room/ she dreams in color/ but does she know that I love her/ I'm swimming in my abyss of insecure blue

JC kept his eyes closed for the duration of the song. For some reason he was afraid to make eye contact. He felt some kind of crazy connection to Hannah, and he was trying to bury the feeling. He knew if he looked at her he wouldn't be able to control whatever pang of desire he was feeling.

He sat in silence about 10 seconds and took a deep breath before he finally opened his eyes and looked over at Hannah, who was still sitting at the bar and holding her mug of hot chocolate to her lips, but not drinking. She was beaming.

"I don't even know what to say. That was...wow that was...Wow. You have me speechless. And I am never speechless."

"Thank you," JC said shyly as he stared down at his foot that he was scuffing against the stage floor.

"I wish I could sing like you. And write a melody that simple and beautiful. Seriously, I'm glad I went first. I would have never been able to sing for you after that."

JC stood up and stretched his arms well above his head and let out a big yawn. He felt self-conscious when he noticed Hannah looking at his exposed stomach, but he didn't rush to tug his shirt down. That would be too obvious. Besides, it felt too good know she was looking at him in that way.

"Um, I'm kind of tired. The shoveling wore me out. Want to go watch a movie or something?"

Hannah slowly released a deep breath she had been holding in. "Yes, that sounds like a great idea."


*****

An hour later, JC was wrapped up in a pile of blankets on the futon watching "The Office." Hannah was almost dozing off in the recliner. The snow had stopped falling, and the roads were actually plowed and in pretty good shape. JC really could have gone back to his hotel, but he didn't say anything. Hannah didn't say anything either, so he really saw no reason to offer to leave. Besides, his bed was already made.

A drowsy Hannah spoke up when the episode ended. "What time do you have to leave in the morning?"

"Well I have to be in Chanhassen at 9:00. We're starting earlier tomorrow."

"OK, well I'm going to bed. I will wake you up at 7:00. That should give you enough time to shower, dig out your car, and get there on time."

"OK." She started to walk out of the room. "Hannah?"

She stopped in the doorway and turned toward him. JC got up from his bed and headed toward her, wearing his black T-shirt and a pair of University of Minnesota Hockey sweatpants Hannah had loaned him. When he was within arms length of her, he reached out and ran his hand over her long, mocha hair. He leaned in and gently placed a kiss on her cheek."

"Thank you," he said, his eyes glistening with sincerity.

"You're welcome JC." She pulled away and patted his sholder.

JC sighed as he crawled back under the covers. He was going to miss Minnesota.

*****

The sound of feet stomping on the ground startled JC as he flipped a pancake.

"JC! JC! Wake up! Oh my God, I'm so sorry. My alarm didn't go off!" Hannah stopped in her tracks as she turned the corner into the kitchen and saw JC add to a plate stacked tall with pancakes. He was already dressed and had set the table for breakfast.

"Don't worry. I couldn't sleep that well. I've been up since 6:30. I'm showered, already got all of the snow off my car, and found some pancake mix. I figured after all you've done for me, I owed you one."

"I thought you said you didn't cook?"

"I can do breakfast. All guys can grill and do breakfast."

Hannah grinned, while trying to smooth the hairs that had fallen out of her ponytail. "Well I guess that's true, isn't it?"

She sat at the table and JC put two pancakes and a slice of bacon on her plate. "Eat up!"

"Aren't you going to join me?"

"Already ate. I really need to get going. It wouldn't hurt to give myself a few extra minutes in case I get lost - which I'm sure I will. I did yesterday." He chuckled.

"Well you have the directions I wrote for you. You won't get lost. And if you do, just give me a call." Hannah left the kitchen and came back a few seconds later with her business card. "Here. This has all of my information." She looked up at him and they held eye contact for a few seconds. "Don't be afraid to contact me." She paused. "For anything." She added quietly.

"Hannah, thank you so much. I mean," he paused. He wasn't sure what to say. "I really appreciate it. With all of my heart. You completely went out of your way to make me feel at home."

"I didn't..." she tried to interrupt.

"You did. Thank you. And I will contact you. I promise. Lost or not. I don't meet to many people these days that I think are true friends. I think you could be." Jesus, he thought to himself. Do I always sound this damn sappy?

Hannah leaned in and gave him a tight hug. "It was so nice to meet you JC. I think you could be a good friend, too. Drive safely."

"I will. Enjoy your breakfast."

"I will."

JC reluctantly let her go. "I left your sweatpants on the futon."

"Wait." Hannah ran out of the room and came back with the pants. "I want you to keep them. Everyone needs a pair of Minnesota Hockey sweats. I insist."

"Thank you. Ok, I really need to leave or I'll never say goodbye." He slipped on his jacket and headed to the door. Hannah held the door open and watched him decend down the stairs.

"Goodbye JC."

He glanced up at her and lifted his hand in a slight wave. "Goodbye Hannah."